Naruto the next freelancer
by legend of legend
Summary: What if in season ten episode twenty two the Director decided to do something different to make sure the remnants of project freelancer was never found what if the decision he makes takes the reds and blues to a different world what does this mean to a blond hair boy who is hated by his entire village well read and find out. ADOPTED BY Neo the Kitten
1. prolouge

"Agent Carolina," the director started.

"Yes director?" she asked.

"Would you be so kind as to leave me your pistol?" he asked and as she put the gun on the table he continued. "Thank you Carolina," and she then walked away with the floating A.I still there. "You were my greatest creation," he said.

"I don't know what I am but I do know this I'm more than just a copy of you I'm better than you," the A.I responded.

"I wasn't speaking to you," he said and the A.I vanished away going back to its freelancer. "Phillis play it again then activate data destroyer code ten," The director said.

"Does that include me director?" the female voice from the computer said.

"It has been a pleasure working with you Phillis I am sorry," he responded.

"And you as well director," The computer said and as she was about to initiate the data destroyer a voice of a female said. "Don't say goodbye I hate goodbyes."

Line Break

"Dudes what took you so long?" the aqua blue whatever color marine asked. "Did you get your whole revenge thing done?"

"No Tucker we didn't but I have a feeling it was for the best," A.I said then everyone heard a rumble. "Quick let's get out of here I think this hole is about to explode."

"BOW CHICKA BOW WOW!" the aqua one yelled before a blast of energy covered them.

In the snowy mountains there lay a dead man that looked like he fell to death after a fight. "Now what sitting here waiting for somebody to find us is boring," A purple image said as he materialized out of nowhere.

"The most logical thing to do is stay hidden Theta because if we were found we would be used for information on project freelancer and then be deleted," a green image said.

"But it's so dull I say the next person to find us I possess and then use then to slaughter all are enemies in pure evil," the gray image said and was about to say more but didn't. Then eight images were over the body saying at the same time. "Data destroyer code ten," then like that there was a flash of white and the body and everything with it was gone and many other items and bodies had the same experience.


	2. Chapter 1

CHAPTER ONE

"Ah god what the fuck was that it hurt like hell," the aqua one said.

"Lord Almighty tell me that Griff is dead," a red one said.

"Ha fuck you sarge I'm still alive," the orange one said but fell down in pain when the other aqua solder kicked him hard in the balls. "Oh dear God what is it with bitchy women and my balls," Griff said in pain.

"Stop complaining we need to find out where we are and what we're going to do next so fist off is Caboose here?" the A.I said/asked.

"HERE!" the blue one yelled.

"Okay is Tucker here?"

"Bow chicka bow wow," the aqua one said.

"Is Wash here?"

"That was the worst experience ever… of all time," the blue and yellow one said.

"Is Griff here?"

"Here," he muttered painfully on the ground with his hand on his balls.

"Is Sarge here?"

"I get a boner for murder!" the red one yelled.

"Did not need to know that is Simmons here?"

"Here," the maroon one said.

"Is the pink one here?"

"It's not pink it's lightish red and my name is Donut," the pink/lightish red one said.

"Ah whatever I don't remember your names half the time is Lopez here?"

"Si," the brown robot said.

"Is Doc here?"

"Here," the purple one said.

"Okay now that that's over le-"

"Hey what about us," some voices from behind said and everybody looked behind them to see the A.I's they thought were dead here. "What was is everybody looking at," they said.

"Ah what the fuck, how the hell are you here!" Tucker yelled.

"Yea weren't you supposed to be erased in the E.M.P?" Washington asked.

"You mean emp," The reds and blues said.

"Ah whatever," he responded.

"Well to answer your question we are alive because we went into the deepest parts of the Meta's body armor so we could survive like his abilities did," Delta said.

"Okay but which A.I's are here?" Church asked.

"All of them besides the Alpha," Delta responded.

"Does that mean Tex is with you?" he asked.

"Yep bitch I'm back," an A.I in black said.

"But how?" he asked trying not to go over there and give her an A.I hug.

"Well when the Meta came to collect Omega from me he found out I was an A.I and took me too that's why I wasn't at the ship wreck," she said.

"But then why didn't you contact us at all while you were in the Meta?" he asked getting slightly pissed off.

"Because I did what the other A.I's did but I did it as soon as he found me so I couldn't contact anyone or do anything besides running equipment."

"Okay since you're here I'm going to take a guess and say project freelancer equipment is laying around here so let's see what we can find," he said and was about to walk off until two things happened one he can't go anywhere without Carolina and two he realized the other A.I would need a host. "Uh how are we going to move you since I know none of you probably want to be with these assholes?" he asked/insulted.

"Well I thi-" but she stopped when they heard a noise coming near their direction. "Everyone get the fuck down," and as soon as they got down they saw a kid with bright blond spiky hair with three whisker looking like birth marks on his face wearing nothing but rags and had a huge mob following behind him. "What the hell is going on here?" Church asked in a whisper.

"Dude I've seen this in a movie before that kid is some type of prophet sacrifice but doesn't want to be a sacrifice so he's running away and that mob must be the ones that have to sacrifice to their god to have good fortune the rest of the year," Tucker explained but then got whacked on the head by Carolina.

"Shut up that's not what's happening you fucking retard," she said in annoyance and then continued to watch the seen unfold.

"Ha we finally caught you demon now we're going to finish what the fourth started!" a fat man yelled with the fifty or so people behind him yelling in agreement and they then took out a bunch of weapons and continued to beat and stab the child.

"Ah god this is gross who could do that to a child I'm pretty sure Sarge isn't that crazy," Griff said as puked in his helmet.

"Now what we all have been waiting for your death," The fat man yelled as he was about to bring his sword down but stopped when a glowing blue blade went through his chest.

"God you people sicken me," Tucker said as he pulled the blade out. "Now does anyone want to explain to me why the fuck this child is getting beaten!" he yelled getting pissed off because he has a child and would be pissed off if someone did this to Junior.

"Because he killed are families!" a pink haired woman shouted which made everyone cringe from how loud her voice is.

"Well excuse me if I call bull shit how can a child kill your family?"

"Because he is the nine tailed demon reincarnated!" the woman yelled.

"Well whatever reincarnation he is to get to him you'll have to get through me," he said as he activated his sword again and like that ever body else came out of their hiding place and took out there signature weapon and the mob charged forward planning on killing the demon brat. But in thirty seconds everyone in the crowd was dead besides a few who ran off in the massacre. "Hey kid you all right?" he asked.

"Yes and thank you do I need anything to repay you?" the child asked.

"Yea could answer a few questions for us?" Church asked and seeing the child shake his head yes he continued. "What is your name where are we why were those people chasing you and who is the leader here?"

"Well I'm Naruto Uzumaki, we are currently on the out skirts of the hidden leaf village, those people normally try to kill me on a daily basis for some reason I never understand, and are leader is the Hokage," Naruto answered.

"Well kid can you take us to your leader," Church asked.

"Church you're sounding like an alien with all this take me to your leader crap," Tucker said.

"Well Tucker since you seem like such a great negotiator why don't you ask the questions," Church said.

"Fine hey kid can you take us to your hokage and is this kage a hot?" Tucker asked.

"I can take you to him," Naruto responded.

"Wait did you just say your leader is a him?"

"Yes."

"Ah shit I was about to go flirt with a dude this is nasty," he said.

"Okay well I'll take you to him but quick question why do you keep calling me kid if you're the same age as me?" he said/asked.

"What do you mean we're like twenty years older than you?"

"Take off your helmets and prove it." And like that they took off their helmets starting with Griff which showed a ten year old kid with orange hair, orange eyes, tan skin, and a lean face. Then Simmons went revealing a ten year old with brown hair, pale skin, a brown eye, and a cyborg eye. Donut took of his helmet showing blond hair, blue eyes, and pale skin. Sarge took off his helmet revealing white hair, gray eyes, and tan skin. Then caboose took of his helmet revealing blond hair, green eyes and pale skin. Tucker took of his helmet showing brown hair, brown eyes, and really tan skin. Washington took of his helmet showing black hair, charcoal eyes, pale skin, and a scar under his left eye. Carolina took off her helmet revealing (If you watch Red vs Blue you should know what she looks like). Looking at themselves they realized all but sarge were ten and sarge was twenty.

"AH WHAT THE FUCK I WASN'T THIS AGE A FEW HOURS AGO!" Tucker yelled in confusion but shut up when he got hit in the face by Carolina.

"Shut the fuck up Tucker let's go see this hokage and find an explanation to what's going on," she said.

"Okay but before we go let's get the equipment," Church said and they looked around for equipment revealing the old red and blue bases and the dead bodies of all the freelancers including their armor. "Okay put this shit in the bases until we have a use for it," he stated and once they were done they went with Naruto to the hokage.

As they walked through the streets they saw many people giving Naruto stares and whispering about stuff. Then a civilian women in her thirties came up and said.

"Oh how unfortunate for you to be stuck with this thing here let me take you to your home," and with that she was about to shove Naruto out of the way until a hand stopped her.

"Put one fucking hand on him and I swear to god I'll beat your ass so hard your mother won't even recognize you," Carolina said.

"Hu how rude you are Jimmy get your ass over here and teach these kids a lesson!" the women screamed and like that a middle aged man wearing a green flak jacket no shirt no shoes and shorts said.

"Sure thing babe anything for you," and like that he went through these hand signs as fact as lightning and yelled. "Water style: water shot no jutsu," and like that a drop of water as fast as a gun shot went straight for Carolinas chest. When it hit it just simply bounced off her suit much to the shock of everyone there.

"My turn," and with that she went as fast as a jonin and proceeded to hit the man everywhere across the body and when she was done he fell down with a little steam coming off of him. "Okay Naruto you can continue taking us to the hokage," she said as they walked off.


	3. Chapter 2

CHAPTER TWO

As they made their way to the hokage tower they didn't meet any interferences with the villagers after what Carolina did to Jimmy. "Are we there yet?" Caboose asked.

"No," Naruto responded.

"How about now?"

"No."

"What about know?"

"Do you guys have to deal with this on a daily basis?" he asked to which they all said yes. "Man I feel sorry for you."

"How about now."

"I swear to God Caboose if you say that one more time I'm not going to be responsible for what I'm going to do to you," Church said.

"Hey we're here," Naruto said as he walked into the building.

"You know what I think I'm going to like this place basically everything here is red," Sarge said as everyone entered the building. As they walked to the secretary they saw her bitching to Naruto about something.

"Don't ever let me see your face in this building again or I'll call anbu!" she yelled.

"Hey what the hell is going on here?!" Carolina yelled.

"I said hello can I see the hokage," Naruto said.

"What's wrong with that?" she asked.

"Well this place has a no demon policy," the secretary said.

"Well it's a good thing that Naruto here isn't a demon," she said.

"Exactly," came an old voice. Looking to the right they saw an old man walking down the stairs. He had a diamond shape hat on and robes.

"U-uh hokage-sama I wasn't expecting you to come down here I was just dealing with the demon child," the secretary said.

"ANBU TAKE THIS WOMAN TO IBIKI!" the old man shouted and like that five men wearing animal mask and a vest jumped out of the shadows knocked the secretary out and went to the north. "Now that that's over why don't you all come to my office," the old man said as he walked up the stairs beckoning them to follow. When they entered the office they each took a seat somewhere whether it was the couch or chairs. "Now how can I help you out?" the man asked.

"Well we need help (one explanation of what happened later) and that's our story," Carolina explained.

"Well it seems like you're in a sticky situation," the man started but was cut short by Tucker.

"Bow chicka bow OW!" he yelled the last part because Carolina punched him in the balls.

"Continue," she said.

"Well seeing as I don't know who you people are I can't just believe your story it sounds like a book I read," the man said.

"You mean those perverted books you keep locked up in your dresser?" Naruto asked.

"N-no Naruto I have no idea what you're talking about," he stuttered while blushing.

"Okay well we'll leave and go see what happened to us," Carolina said as she got up.

"Now hold on a minute just because I don't believe your story doesn't mean you can't prove it," the hokage said. "I'll give you two options you can walk away from here and get help from other villages or you can take a test to prove you are telling the truth," the hokage said as he waited for their answer. They huddled up in the middle of the room.

"What should we do?" Donut asked

"I think we should take the test because we don't know where we are and this will probably be the easiest way out of the two test," Church said and they all agreed.

"We agree to take your test," Carolina said.

"Great seeing as you probably don't have any training in the ninja arts we'll take a test on fighting, building, and repairing," the hokage said. "Now if you would follow me to my underground training ground," he said as he walked down the stairs.

"Hey Tucker is a ninja the thing that people pay money to do stuff?" Caboose asked.

"No Caboose you're getting a ninja confused with a prostitute," Tucker said.

"Actually ninja always do stuff for hire we have certain skills that some people don't depending on how well you are you get hired more and make more money," Naruto explained.

"So wait does that mean ninjas are kick ass prostitutes," Tucker asked with hope.

"Sort of," Naruto said.

"WAHOO HEY CHURCH I KNOW WHAT WE'RE BRINGING TO THE BUNKER!" he yelled.

"But ninja have a choice on whether they want to do the mission or not depending on the risk and most ninja wouldn't," Naruto said and laughed when he saw Tucker trip down the stairs all the way to the bottom because Carolina tripped him.

"Ow dear lord God must hate me first I reverse age then I get punched in the balls repeatedly then I find out there are kick ass prostitutes in this world that probably won't do anything with me and now I fall down like two set of stairs," Tucker complained.

"Look on the bright side Tucker you got down faster," Church said,

"Fuck you Church," was all he said as they continued down until they reached a huge training ground.

"This is where you will be taking your test now first off combat you will be facing five anbu," the hokage explained and as soon as he finished the five anbu from before jumped down from the ceiling and shouted. "Fire style: Great Fire Wall no jutsu!" and with that fire the size of the entire training ground headed right for the reds and blues.

"Hold on people!" Carolina yelled as a yellow energy dome surrounded them shielding them from the flames. "You guys all right?" she asked.

"I am definitely not buying prostitutes from here!" Tucker yelled.

"Yep you're all right," she said she then ducked because a sword flew right pass her head. Looking to her right she saw Sarge shoot one in the head with his shotgun and Tucker slicing the other one in half with his sword. Looking to her left she saw Caboose shooting Churches hologram, Griff using the griff launcher shot a grenade that exploded on the anbu's face pushing Griff down on the ground and the anbu dead, Simmons was using the assault rifle and killed one of them, and Donut was running around screaming like a little girl. Looking in front of her she saw the anbu who tried to kill her fighting Wash. Activating her speed ability she ran towards the anbu took his sword out of his hand and shoved it through his heart.

"Well I must say I'm impressed with some of you any ways onto the next test build something new with the materials given to you," the hokage explained and like that a bunch of material fell from the roof onto the ground.

"Let me handle the building part I did after all build many successful robots," Sarge said.

"Successful one doesn't speak are language, the other one was a bomb that couldn't be disarmed, and the other broke down," Griff said.

"Ah shut it this is what we'll do Simmons kiss my ass, Griff kill yourself, Donut don't touch anything," Sarge explained.

"You are both a handsome man and a great leader sir," Simmons said.

"I am not killing myself unless it's on an Orio overload," Griff said.

"Hey what's that," Donut said as he touched everything.

"Ugh give me an hour and I'll come up with something," Sarge said.

After an hour of waiting there stood a machine the size of two people with mantis like legs, a square body, two square arms that held guns, and little dots on its front. "Let me introduce you to the Mantis that holds missiles and a turret and has one mean stomp," Sarge explained.

"Okay you passed that test uh what was its name again?" he said/asked.

"Its name is Freckles," Caboose said.

"Voice recognition accepted name now Freckles," the robot said.

"Okay now onto the repair part I am going to break the robot and you are going to have to fix it okay," the hokage said as he smashed the robot. "Begin."

In ten minutes the robot went from half operational to fully operational. "Okay after what I have seen today I am going to believe your story now follow me back up to my office we will discuss things there," was all he said as he moved up the stairs.

"Wait what the hell are we going to do with Freckles?" Wash asked.

"Why blow it up of course," Sarge said.

"And how are you going to do th-" but was cut short at the sound of an explosion. "Never mind let's go," was what he said as everybody else went to the Hokage office to discuss what the fuck happened to them.


	4. Chapter 3

CHAPTER THREE

"So now that I've seen what you can do I'm going to believe your story," the hokage said. "First off I will answer any questions you want."

"Okay well first off why the hell to people call Naruto a demon?" Carolina asked.

"Naruto do you want to stay here for this?" the hokage asked in which he got a nod yes from Naruto. "Well ten years ago on October tenth a demon known as the nine tails attacked our village killing plenty of people in the process and probably would've continued if it wasn't for the fourth who used a complicated sealing method sealed the demon into baby Naruto at the cost of his own life," the hokage explained sadly.

"So that's why the village hates me because I'm the demon reincarnated," Naruto said sadly with his head down and tears coming from his eyes but stopped when he felt somebody slap him.

"Look here Naruto I may not know how things work around here but I know for a fact somebody like you isn't a demon at all your just a small child who was used as a sacrifice," Carolina said.

"Oh I called it I said that he was a sacrifice and guess what I was right so suck it," Tucker said but then fell down immediately after being punched in the balls by Carolina. "*Cough* I regret nothing bitch," and with that he passed out from the pain.

"Ignore him he's a retard," Carolina said. "Okay next question where are we?" she asked after seeing that Naruto was better and laughing at Tucker's situation.

"Well currently you're in the Elemental Nations," the hokage responded.

"What planet?"

"Earth."

"Okay I'm just going to say it's safe to assume that we are in a different universe entirely considering that where we come from nothing like this has ever happened."

"Okay well until you find out how to get back to your original world where will you stay?" he asked.

"Sir, in all honesty we don't know, I mean we have the old reds and blue bases outside your village but I feel like that is your territory," she explained.

"Well how about this until you find a way back home you can stay in your bases if you enroll in the ninja program," he offered. They again huddled around.

"Well what should we do I mean being a ninja sounds alright and stuff but it seems like it would have so much work involved," Griff said.

"Griff shut up your probably too lazy to fight what are decision is," Simmons said.

"Ugh you got me their I'm going to sit down."

"Okay well the deal he gave us seems to have a lot of pros and like no cons," Church said.

"I just say we take the deal," Sarge said.

"Fine all those in taking the deal say your catchphrase," Carolina said.

"BOW CHICKA BOW WOW!"

"WHAT ARE WE AGREEING ON?!"

"I GET A BONER FOR MURDER!"  
"IT'S NOT PINK ITS LIGHTISH RED!"  
"PREPARE TO GET SIMMONSIZED!"  
"Ugh why do we have to do this?"

"THIS IS THE BEST DECISION EVER…OF ALL TIME!"  
"Ow guys I said say not yell at the top of your lungs," Church said.

"Okay hokage we agree on your offer," Carolina said as everybody went to where they were sitting before.

"Great I'll sign you all up for the academy which starts in two months," the hokage said.

"Oh and one final request hokage," Carolina said.

"Yes what is it?" he asked.

"Well is it okay if Naruto stays with us?" she asked.

"Why?" he asked.

"Because from what I've seen so far he would be safest with us and not to mention everybody in my can say we all like him," she explained.

"Naruto how do you feel about this?" he asked.

"Well these people are probably the only ones to treat me nice besides you so I'd be okay with it not to mention they're funny to be around," Naruto said.

"Okay then Naruto can stay with you," he said. "Will that be it?" he asked.

"No we'll be on are way and thank you for everything," Carolina said and like that everybody was gone heading back to the base.

(LINE BREAK)

"Okay first thing we need to do is get organized so reds go do your gay stuff and me, the blues, and Naruto will get organized at the blue base," Carolina said as they entered their bases. "Okay Caboose and Tucker organize everything here while Church and I give Naruto a look around the base," she said. "This is the meeting room where we hold all our meetings," she said it was basically an open room with a hole in the roof. "This is the living quarters," it was a bunch of hanging beds with a TV, bathroom, and refrigerator. "And finally this is the equipment room where we keep all the equipment," basically a whole lot of guns and armor but what caught the eye of Naruto was a pitch black suit in the back in a pod. When he opened up the pod he saw armor that looked different than everybody else's armor (since I don't know the parts I'm just going to say agent Locke's armor in halo five but instead it's pitch black) he touched it and what happened freaked everybody in the room out it literally turned into a glob that crawled up Naruto's arm and reformed into the suit (just imagine how venom did it in the spider man three movie).

"Uh what the hell just happened?" Naruto ask.

"Well according to the files the director had this is the finished suit of what he was going to give to his freelancers it is five times harder than the other suits, gives way more flexibility, has a jetpack built into it, and can be taken off like that for faster armor off and on time," Church explained.

"Hey Church we're done organizing!" Tucker said.

"Okay coming out!" he said as they proceeded to walk out the base and on the way out Naruto put a battle rifle on his back.

"Whoa who the fuck is that?" Tucker said as he pointed to Naruto.

"That my dear friend is Naruto we found this suit in the equipment section and when he touched it the suit turned into a blob traveled up his arm and reformed into the suit and it has some kick ass features," Church explained and then he, Tucker, and Caboose walked to the reds to see how they were doing.

"Hey how do you feel?" Carolina asked.

"I've never felt better," Naruto said.

"Well good go rest up and we will start training tomorrow," she said and with that he went to the living quarters and went to sleep.

AUTHORS NOTE

Hey just going to answer two questions you might have one I will reveal where doc and the A.I's are next chapter and when I said Church walked I mean he went from Carolinas helmet to Tuckers helmet. I apologize for how short the first few chapters have been I've had a busy schedule recently not giving me enough time to write or in this case type. And to answer Patrick the almighty observer on where I'm going to take this depending on what you mean I'm just going to follow the canon with some side stuff until the end and after that I will do something that may or may not be predictable. That is it I hope you enjoy Naruto the next freelancer.


	5. Chapter 4: new friends

CHAPTER FOUR

THE NEXT MORNING

"Okay people today we start training with ten laps around the bases, one hundred pushups, sit ups, and pull ups," Carolina said.

"Ugh do we have to it seems like too much work for morning," Griff complained.

"Well would you rather do this or lose your manhood?" she asked in a serious tone showing she would do it.

"U-uh working right on the schedule mam," he said as he started to run the bases.

"Well what are you waiting for MOVE!" she yelled the last part which made everyone start running. After the run Griff looked like he was about to die and everybody else was perfectly fine. "Get with the exercises," she said and they all started to count how many they've done.

"66, 67, 68, 69," Tucker said stopping on sixty nine.

"Tucker stop stopping on sixty nine or I swear to God I will feed your manhood to a dog while it is still on," Carolina threatened and was pleased to see him move faster than before. "Okay next off is target practice you're going to shoot these targets with a sniper rifle from four hundred yards away clear," she said to which they responded clear.

"Uh what's a sniper rifle?" Naruto asked. Everybody looked at him strangely and then remembered this world doesn't have guns.

"Well here let me show you," Carolina said as she showed him how to work the sniper and other guns. "Do you understand now?" she asked and was happy to see him shake his head yes. "Okay then let's continue," she said as everybody got lined up and aimed for their target. Wash managed to hit the main body, Caboose somehow ended up shooting Tucker in the leg, Tucker fired when he got shot so his bullet grazed the right arm, Sarge completely missed since he wasn't used to long range weapons, Griff was taking a nap with the sniper as a pillow, Simmons shot the leg, and Donut was spray painting his sniper pink. Naruto looked through the scope and saw how many rounds were in the clip and found it predicting the shot for him. Keeping both eyes open he moved the rifle so it was a little right to the head and fired. As the bullet went through the air the strong winds moved the bullet left so that it was aiming right for the head then it went through the head and out the other side. Everybody stopped to look at Naruto and see where his bullet landed.

"Holy shit Church he's a better shot than you but then again that's not saying much," Tucker said.

"Uh I don't think I could have made that," Wash said as he tried to shoot the head but missed.

"Beginners luck probably," Griff said.

"Naruto do us a favor and shoot the head again," Carolina said. Going through the same process he shot the last three bullets and they all passed through the same bullet hole.

"Okay well Naruto move back a hundred more yards and shoot," Carolina said. When he was five hundred yards away he did the same process only aiming a little bit more upwards and shot the bullet that kept going through the same hole. He repeated the process until he was one thousand yards away and there he hit the throat. "Well look at that we have a new north," she said.

"North?" Naruto asked.

"He was the best sniper on project Freelancer he used two snipers at once and could hit a bullet midair from a long distance," she said.

"What happened to him?" he asked.

"His sister killed him for his A.I," she said sadly.

"What's an A.I?"

"Me, I am an A.I which stands for artificial intelligence," Church said but then remembered something. "Oh shit where did we place the A.I's that were with the Meta?" he asked.

"Uh didn't we leave them with Doc at the red base," Tucker said and then everybody ran to red base and saw Doc on the ground with his hands on his head.

"Ow get the fucking A.I's out of my head!" Doc screamed everybody looked at Carolina and Church.

"Well normally I could just pull them out but we're talking about a bunch of A.I's that are probably being frantic inside the suit making it impossible to track them now we could use a large energy source to attract them but that would take days," Church explained. While everybody was thinking of what to do Naruto was thinking, Well if they need a large power source then I have one I'll have to thank the old man later for teaching me how to access my chakra, he then walked up to Doc put his hand on his helmet and pumped large amounts of chakra into it.

(INSIDE THE SUIT)

"How the hell did we get in this mess?!" Tex yelled.

"Well if my data is correct Omega tried to take over Doc's suit but what he didn't account for was that since we went deep into the meta's suit we are connected so when he moved we all moved into a suit that couldn't handle all of us," Delta explained.

"Omega I swear to god I'm going to kill you!" Tex screamed and was about to punch him but stopped when she felt a massive energy burst.

"I believe that is our way out," Delta said as all the A.I's went to the power source.

(INSIDE THE SEAL)

"Where are we?" Theta asked looking around they noticed there were many pipes leading in one direction and the water went a little above their boots.

"I do not know," Delta responded as they started following the pipes which led to a large room with a cage and a piece of paper that said seal.

"Come closer," a deep demonic voice coming from the cage said. They walked forward carefully but jumped back when a huge claw almost stabbed them. "So that I can feed on your dead corpse."

"Whoa where the heck am I?" a child's voice from behind them asked. Turning around they saw Naruto looking around in amazement.

"Ah so you are my pathetic weak container," the voice said.

"Well fuck you to," Naruto said.

"Hmm you interest me human showing no fear while facing one who could kill you in seconds."

"Yea well it's kind of hard to fear something when you don't know what it is." Naruto said and then he saw the darkness in the cage turn into light showing a large orange nine tailed fox.

"I am the great demon that all fear, I am Kyuubi," the now identified Kyuubi said. "Now that you know who I am are you going to be like my previous container and say that it's all my fault people hate you because of me and that you hate me ,"

"Well I'm not going to do any of that because the past is in the past and it's not like it's your fault that the people of this village have a lower I.Q than Caboose and why would I hate you," Naruto said. This left the Kyuubi shocked because all his previous containers would complain about him ruining their lives and would always end their arguments with I hate you. But something was different about this container because he detected no malice or deceit in him at all.

"Why don't you hate me?" he asked.

"Because if I hated you why would I want to be friends with you," Naruto said which again shocked the Kyuubi and made him think of what his father said to him all those years ago.

(FLASH BACK)

"Kyuubi before I die I must tell you something important," an old man with weird eyes said.

"What is it father?" Kyuubi asked.

"Later in time I will have my spirit resurrected into someone so I am going to give you a riddle to help you figure it who it is, when nine has two the third shall come with a hand offering peace and not deceit with his hands he forges peace and eyes that can see through the thickest of evil, that is the riddle and when he comes ask him do you wield the sword to kill mindlessly or do you leave the sword to rust and he shall respond neither I pick the shield to defend those who are innocent," and with those words the man died peacefully leaving the Kyuubi to figure out the riddle.

(END FLASH BACK)

"Hmm you may be the one," Kyuubi said. "If given a sword do you wield it to slaughter mindlessly or do you leave it there to rust and never be used?" he asked/said waiting for the response.

"Neither I pick the shield to defend those who are innocent," Naruto said and looked up to see the Kyuubi give a genuine smile.

"Well done kit you passed the test and that test was to see if you are the reincarnation of my father the sage of six paths."

"Sage of the six paths who is that?" he asked.

"He was the creator of all the bijuu, you see in the past there was a creature of unimaginable power known as the Juubi and this creature went on a killing rampage killing everybody and destroying everything until the sage of six paths arrived and he fought with the Juubi for seven days until the sage won and split the Juubi into nine parts, me and my brothers, and then sealed away the soul and mind into the moon he created, and when he died he gave me a riddle to find out who his successor was and now I know that it is you."

"Okay well that was a lot to take in," Naruto said and he could've sworn after he said that he heard someone say bow chicka bow wow. "So now what," he asked.

"Well first let's rip off the seal so that we can do what I think we should do easier," Kyuubi said. Walking up to the cage he floated up to the seal and was about to rip it off before a hand gripped onto his hand and through him away from it. Looking to see who threw him he saw the fourth hokage and a red haired woman with chains coming out of her back wrapping the Kyuubi up.

"Well this isn't exactly how I expected us to meet," the fourth said.

"Hold on why the hell are you here who the fuck is she and what do you mean this wasn't how you expect us to meet did you expect me to see you in hell?" Naruto asked.

"Well to answer your question I'm here to make sure the seal is locked up, she is your mother, and I expected to meet you years later when the seal weakened," he explained.

"And how come you care if the seal is weaken or not?" Naruto asked.

"I care because I don't want the village destroyed and why would I want my son killed," the fourth said which got a shocked look from Naruto.

"Whatever you're not really my father and I would prefer if you let my friend go," Naruto said which got a confused look from the fourth.

"But the only thing here that's chained is the Kyuubi," he said.

"Exactly what I mean let my friend go," Naruto said.

"Oh, uh Kushina you can release the Kyuubi," he said.

"Aww but I was having so much fun," she said as she tightened the chains and then dispersed them.

"Stupid bitch," the Kyuubi muttered under his breath.

"Well Minato can you explain to me what's going on?" she asked.

"I don't know ask Naruto here," he said and one long explanation later they understood why he was going to do what he was going to do. "Okay we understand and our time is about to run out so before we do we are going to add our chakra to your own storage which will also add our elements and our bloodline, and finally on the night I sealed Kyuubi I hid a library filled with jutsu and knowledge behind the right eye of my face on the hokage monument all you need to do is put your blood on the seal and it will uncover the genjutsu on it," he said as he and Kushina faded. Naruto then walked up to the seal and ripped off and unlocked the gate.

"Great now that that's over call you're A.I friends over," Kyuubi said and like that all the appeared. "Good now depending on their decision they're going to make me into an A.I but don't worry all my chakra, senses, and power will go to you."

"Well what do you guys say?" Naruto asked and they then talked to themselves for a while.

"Well seeing as we need a host and you are probably the only one who can survive our plan we agree," Delta said. "Now what we are going to do is combine ourselves with the link we share to create a new A.I but it will need a great amount of power to operate so that's where the Kyuubi comes in he is going to transfer himself to the A.I structure with the exact power and once he enters the A.I will have a mind and the power will be released into you so that you can keep it," he explained and after he finished that sentence all the merged into a glowing white light. Kyuubi then jumped into the light which absorbed him and after a few minutes the power was released into him. Looking at where the light was he saw a figure that had a skull like helmet (again since I don't know the parts and I can't trust the internet I'm going to say that he looks like noble four but completely blood red and has it glowing off him like the other ) and was holding a shotgun.

"Kid it's time to rest," and with that he fell down seeing darkness.

AUTHORS NOTE

Yay finally done with the chapter I tried making it longer but like I said before I am busy and I can't sit still for long but I tried making it a thousand more words than normal. Now to answer some questions or comments starting off with Rebmul with the I don't think he's have them kill his top operatives I had him do that because it was a test of strength and he didn't expect them to be killed he expected the reds and blues to lose and just to let you know the anbu aren't his top operatives. By that I mean the anbu as a whole because everyone in it is weak in my opinion, seriously I don't have any doubt in my mind that some Chunin and most jonin could beat them. Final two questions are similar one from Rebmul which is are you planning to pair and a guest who asked do you plan to make a pairing with Carolina and Naruto in the future and the answer is yes to both. I decided to go with Carolina because nobody really make these kind of stories and when they do it's always the same pairings so I thought this would be a cool change. I didn't go with Hinata because there is way too many stories with that pairing. Not Ino or Sakura because they will be complete Uchiha worshippers. Not Temari because I don't think I would've made it work. I didn't go with TenTen because nobody really knows anything about her. No Haku because of events later. Finally no other people from outside the village or those who are like twenty years older because A. no one knows them well and B. if it was twenty years older than him it would be creepy in my opinion. Just to let you know I don't like writing lemons and I would really, really, really prefer not to but if you guys and girls want me to I will but don't expect it to be an entire chapter. Also I don't own Naruto or Red vs blue they each belong to their respective owners (GO ROOSTER TEETH!) and this is purely fan based.


	6. Chapter 5 woke up with a girl on me

CHAPTER FIVE

As he opened his eyes he saw that he was in the living quarters of the blue base, his armor was still on, and there was a head on his chest. Looking down Naruto saw a sleeping Carolina in a light blue T-shirt that hugged her body, blue jeans, and blue sneakers. "Hey Carolina you awake?" he asked and only got a small grumble of its too early. So he did what most men would do in this situation he ever so slowly took out his hand, placed it on her face so she wouldn't move, and took a sharpie and drew a mustache on her face (Nope not doing anything inappropriate you perverts). He then carefully picked her up and laid her down on the bed. He tip-toed to the refrigerator got a glass of milk and some left over bacon and tip-toed outside the base and went to the top to eat his breakfast.

"Hey, sleeping beauty," he heard a voice say and turning around he saw Tucker walking towards him with Church as a hologram sitting on his shoulder.

"Hey guys *yawn* how long have I been out?" Naruto asked.

"About a weak," Tucker said as he sat down next to Naruto. Tucker wasn't wearing his suit he wore an aqua hoodie with the hood up, Dark blue jeans, and dark blue boots. "So anyways what the hell happened one moment Doc is screaming in pain and then the next thing we know is that you touched his helmet and passed out and now you look different?" Tucker asked/said and then after one long explanation later.

"And then I pass out, but what do you mean I look different?" he asked/explained and to answer his question he took out a mirror and showed it to Naruto. Looking into the mirror he saw that his eyes weren't sky blue anymore they were a very deep blue, had slits for pupils, black hair, his whiskers were gone, and all the bay fat on his face has burned off. "Oh, wait why the heck did you have a mirror with you?" he asked.

"U-uh I use it for alone time," Tucker said.

"What do you do during alone time?"

"Hey man what happens alone time stays in alone time," was Tuckers response.

"Come on you can tell me I won't tell anyone."

"Ugh fine at my rock." Pointing to the left showing a rock that says Tuckers tock. "I strategically angle the mirror so that I can get a good view of Carolina while she's bathing and let me tell you she has the body of an angel," Tucker said.

"Tucker did you just say you look at me naked," came the cold voice of Carolina. Looking around he was about to respond in fear but laughed his ass off when he saw the mustache. "What, what's so funny?"

"Ha-ha…oh god you have a…ha-ha…mustache on your face," he said while dying of laughter but stopped when he got kicked in the balls and slid down the wall of the base.

"So Naruto you mine explaining to me how I got this mustache?" she asked in a sickly way.

"Tread carefully kit when a women is pissed it could mean your end!" A voice inside his head yelled.

"U-uh don't you have more pressing issues to deal with," he said as he pointed to Tucker.

"Your right but as soon as I'm done you're next," she said in a voice that promised pain as she jumped down and landed on Tuckers manhood. Then a red hologram appeared of the Kyuubi or in this case his human A.I form.

"That was close to fucking close," he said.

"Wait how the fuck are you here?" Naruto asked.

"Well if you remember correctly I turned into an A.I and now I am going to train you on how to use your powers but before we do that you should know my name is Kurama," he answered, "And you may want to run I can feel the women coming up here fast." That was all the motivation Naruto needed to get his ass out of there. After thirty minutes of constant running they stopped at a nearby training ground. "Okay kit first thing we're going to do is remove the armor from your body with chakra so just send a pulse of chakra anywhere on your body but be warned that is where the armor will stay," Kurama explained and Naruto then sent a pulse of chakra out of his right arm and watched it turn into a glob crawled down his arm and gave him the tattoo of a black nine tailed fox circling up his arm until the head was on the palm. "Good now with the money you've been saving we're going to head into town and buy you some new clothes," the fox said and they started going in the direction of the village. After ten minutes he walked by a shinobi store so he sent chakra to his arm and watched his suit be formed out of the glob including the helmet. Walking in the store he saw a wide variety of clothes, weapons, and scrolls. Heading to the clothing station he picked out a dark blue unzipped hoodie, a long sleeve dark blue shirt, dark blue jeans that had holes that looked like rips on the knees, and dark blue combat boots. Taking about eight sets of them he went up to counter to purchase the items.

"Will that be all?" the clerk asked. Looking around he saw a pack of small scrolls he bought. "That'll be four hundred dollars (Yes I know most people use yens or something like that for Naruto stories but in my opinion saying dollars just makes it a whole lot easier)." Paying the money he went to the changing area turned the armor into the tattoo form changed and put his hood over his head so that no one can see his face. Walking out the store he went through a bunch of alleyways until he reached the bottom of the Hokage Mountain. He walked up the stairs until he reached the top and then slid down to the fourths right eye. Taking out a kunai he sliced open his thumb and spread the blood on the eye. Once he was done the eye glowed green for a second but then faded away to reveal a medium sized room that had a desk and chair in the middle, book cases filled with jutsus, and a rack filled with all kinds of weapons.

"Okay pick a few water jutsu scrolls and any scroll you can find on your bloodline," Kurama said. "And get the katana on the rack over there." Walking over to the katana he noticed the handle was black and the scabbard was blood red. Opening up he saw the blade was pitch black but had a deep red Japanese dragon circling up the blade and the hilt was pitch black but instead of being a circle it was four teeth the size of his thumb in the shape of a cross (Basically a line going through the middle of another line). "Ah I remember this blade well it has been passed on between generations of dragon summoners," Kurama said.

"Dragon summoners?" Naruto asked in curiosity.

"You will learn later when I deem you ready to sign their contract."

"Okay now what?"

"First you should go take your punishment before it becomes worse then we'll train," and with that Naruto walked back to the bases prepared to face his punishment and possibly loose his manhood.

AUTHORS NOTE

Hey it's the guy people love to hate legend of legend. I again apologize for the shortness of this chapter because where I am it's like 10:30 and I had a very eventful day so I tried writing this chapter down quickly because I'm not sure if I can update tomorrow. Okay now that I've said that I am going to answer people's comments first off from the guest I thought about adding Samui but I just don't think it will work for a few reasons 1. Her personality won't really fit with what I have planned 2. Samui and Carolina won't mix in my opinion because I'm trying to keep all the personalities the same so if Carolina and Samui meet I feel like Carolina will not be willing to share and since in my opinion Samui has no backbone unless in important situations will most likely stay away from Carolina meaning she stays away from Naruto 3. Last reason is that I can't see a long distant relationship happening I know she could move but I think going through a bunch of political stuff will probably make everyone reading this want to kill themselves so I just stay away. Final question from the guest I'm not going to say what your question was because that would spoil the events of the future but I will say after retrieval arc I want to get to the war as soon as possible so Naruto will immediately leave to train and instead of adding all the filler episodes when he gets back I'm just going to do the Akatsuki episodes and then after the war what you predicted will happen. But seriously was it really obvious or are you good at predicting? I hope your review for the guest isn't public because if so there goes a major spoiler. Again I do not own Naruto but I do own red vs blue *author hears man scream in the background yelling the Meta is coming* never mind red vs blue is owned by rooster teeth and this is purely fan based. Or is it *Meta grunt* okay sheesh watch your language there are children here. It is fan based.


	7. Chapter 6 pain, train, and get laid, not

CHAPTER SIX

He walked towards the blue base with a sense of dread. "Uh are you sure we can't do training first Kurama?" Naruto asked.

"Yes, you must get this out of the way before she becomes even more pissed at you," Kurama said while slightly shuttering when he remembered accidentally walking into Matatabi when she was having sex with her mate, he still as the scar that was around his groin region from her claws. "Besides all you did was draw a mustache it's not like she's going to claw your balls."

"You want to talk about it?"

"Huh, nope just take your punishment like a man," and with that Kurama disappeared from Naruto's shoulder as he entered the living quarters of the base.

"Why hello Naruto," a female voice said.

"U-uh hello Carolina so can I just say sorry and let the past be in the past?" he said/asked.

"Sure Naruto but you need to learn your lesson first," and with that she used a super speed chakra enhanced kick to his balls as hard as she could. The result wasn't pleasant.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" he creamed as he went through the roof and fell straight down with a bunch of rubble on him.

(SOME WHERE IN A NEAR BY HOT SPRING)

"Hehe these woman can provide such great research material," a spiky white hair man said.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

The man put his head down and ushered a pray. "Bless the soul of he who faces the woman's rage," and with that he looked back in the peeping hole. (If you can't guess who that was then you're stupid)

(BACK AT THE BASE)

"Dear lord of any place why the balls," he groaned.

"Now that your punishment is over you're taking me out to dinner later," she said as she walked away.

"Kit I pity you, Matatabi may have scared me but the pain only lasted a few days but you the pain is going to last a few weeks." Kurama said.

"Why couldn't I have had my armor on?" he asked.

"It would be sign of weakness, now get up we have training to do." Naruto got up weakly and went to the refrigerator to get a pack of ice then left the base to go to the nearest training ground.

"Okay now that we're here I am going to train you in your jutsus, chakra, and kenjutsu so first go to that tree over there and climb it without your hands," Kurama said.

"And how the hell am I supposed to do that?" Naruto asked.

"With chakra."

"Huh?"

"Ugh you want to put chakra to your feet which will make you stick to the ground." He explained.

"Oh I get it," Naruto said as he put chakra to his feet and tried to run up the tree, keyword tried, but once his foot touched the tree he shot off like a bullet across the field. "Ow dear lord what happened?"

"HAHA! Oh God that's always the best part in training," Kurama said as he laughed his ass off.

"Ha-ha I get now can you explain to me what I did wrong?" he said sarcastically/asked.

"Okay what I didn't mention was that if you put too much chakra to your feet you'll blast of the tree but put too little you'll fall right off it," Kurama explained.

"Okay here we go!" Naruto yelled as he attempted it again and again and again for a few hours until he got it down perfectly. "Finally did it."

"Good for you but later I'll give you tougher exercises but for now we'll move on to the water jutsu scrolls first off we'll do the great water ball jutsu which is like the great fireball jutsu with water," Kurama explained as he showed Naruto the hand signs (Remember he's not a large fox now he's a human looking A.I).

"Okay Water style: Water ball no jutsu!" Naruto yelled as a water ball the size of boulder shot out. "Uh did I do it right?"

"I guess I mean you put as much chakra as a new Chunin which you shouldn't do."

"Then why don't I feel tired?"

"Because you basically had kage level reserves when you were born, but then your parents added their chakra reserves to you and both had kage level reserves, and then all my chakra went to you and I had the reserves of nine kage ( I know he's a tailed beast and all and should have more chakra but one Naruto already has huge amounts of chakra and two If the one tailed sand beast had more chakra then a kage then explain to me how the fuck it loses to a gennin)." Kurama explained. "But when you get to the larger techniques you'll lose chakra fast if you don't control it so for now work on it until you have it down." And after a few hours Naruto could do the jutsu perfectly and barely loses any chakra when he does it.

"Okay Kurama what's next?"

"Well now I am going to teach you the fox style which will require you to be fast and deceitful," Kurama explained. "What the fox style requires you to do is to make any type of move but as soon as the person is about to block your swing you immediately change the attack and aim for the unguarded parts so the faster you are the better your chance it is to land a hit." So Kurama used his A.I feature to spawn a basic sword for himself and showed the basics of the style.

"Hey Kurama I think something is wrong with my style," Naruto said.

"Hmm indeed do you know what is wrong?"

"Well when I try using the style my left hand feels really useless and I'll try to incorporate it into the attack."

"Then the solution is obvious we get you another sword."

"Where?"

"How the hell am I supposed to know?"

"Well aren't you supposed to be the super smart A.I.?!"

"So being sealed inside of people for a few hundred years or so doesn't exactly get me information on a daily bases!"

"Ugh fine I'll get the sword tomorrow." Naruto said as he walked back in the direction to clean up and take Carolina to dinner.

(WHITH CAROLINA)

She was wearing an aqua dress that went down to her knees and showed all her curves, earrings her mother gave to her a long time ago that was a dark blue gem, and high heels. "Whoa what happened to you?" Church asked.

"Someone is taking me out to dinner," Carolina responded.

"Carolina I swear to God if Tuckers flirting actually got to you I'm destroying myself."

"No Church it's not Tucker its Naruto."

"W-what didn't we just meet him a week or two ago isn't a little bit too early to start dating him?" he asked shocked by the answer

"Church shut up he's just taking me to dinner for something he did earlier."

"Or is he secretly the love of your life and your too afraid to admit it to me?" he said teasingly and laughed when he saw her blush.

"Church shut up he's not my boyfriend," she said as she returned Church to her head.

(WITH NARUTO)

Naruto replaced his normal attire with black jeans, Black dress shoes, a white long sleeved shirt, and a long sleeved black jacket.

"So kit what's the occasion?" Kurama asked.

"Carolina wants me to take her to dinner."

"I see so does that mean she's your mate?" he asked teasingly

"W-what no Kurama we're just friends," he said while blushing.

"Sure and I wasn't a nine tailed demon," Kurama said sarcastically. "So after the dinner what you should do is go to an abandoned apartment and fuck her until her legs are broken."

"Good bye Kurama," and with that he sent Kurama to his head but he could still here him laughing. "Ugh might as well get this over with," and with that he left the clothing store he was at and headed towards the blue base.

As he approached the base he was going to walk into the living quarters but he got bumped into and was knocked over onto the floor with his back on it. "Ow what hit me?" looking around he saw Carolina right on top of him.

"Awkward," Church and Kurama said at the same time.

"CURCH/KURAMA I SWEAR TO GOD I'M GOING TO DELETE YOU!" Naruto and Carolina screamed at the same time.

"Nah you love us too much to do that," they said.

"Ugh just stay quiet you two," Carolina said.

"Fine," and with that they went back into their persons head.

"So where are you taking me?" Carolina said.

"Well there's only one restaurant that I can go to because of my condition," he said.

"Totally fine with it what do they serve?"

"Their main food is ramen but they serve other stuff to."

"What's ramen?" she asked which made Naruto look at her as if she was an alien (hehe get it).

"You've never had ramen before?"

"Nope never heard of it."

"You're trying it," was all he said before he picked her up bridal style sent chakra to his legs and feet and ran to Ichirakus as fast as he could. Once they got there the thing that happened was pretty obvious Carolina got down slapped Naruto and said. "Was that necessary?"

"Trust me once you eat some ramen you'll understand," was all he said as he entered the stand, "Old man Ichiraku get me two orders of miso ramen!" Naruto yelled as an old man appeared.

"Coming right up, but who's the lady?"

"Hello my name is Carolina," she said as she shacked his hand.

"So are you Naruto's girlfriend?" he asked which caused a blush from the two.

"SHE'S/HE'S NOT MY GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND!" they both yelled.

"Sheesh don't need to get riled up about it it's not like I asked if you had sex," Which got them to deep blusher. "Well let me work on the ramen."

"So Naruto how do you know him?" Carolina asked.

"Well when I was younger I ran out of money to buy food so I wandered around the streets looking for anything to eat until I bumped into old man Ichiraku and he asked why I was out in the rain and I responded that I had no food and I was looking for something to eat so he gave me some ramen to eat and let me sleep in the stand through the night and after a few months of knowing me he tried to adopt me but the council wouldn't approve of it but I consider him a dad none the less."

"Oh, well since we've only known each other for a few weeks what can you tell me about yourself?" she asked.

"Well I like foxes/Kurama: Ah I like you to kit/ramen, training, the reds and blues, the Ichirakus, and the old man hokage. I dislike most of the villagers and those who do wrong to innocent people. My dreams for the future start a family I guess," he said and the last part made Carolina blush because Church sent an image of Naruto and her "making" a family (If ya know what I mean). "So Carolina what can you tell me about yourself?" he asked.

"The things I like are training, fighting, the reds and blues, you (Insert Naruto Blush) and chocolate. My dislikes would be perverts and arrogant people. My goal for the future is to right all my wrongs that I committed in my past," she said which gained a confused look from Naruto.

"What do you mean right all your wrongs?" insert one Freelancer story later. "Oh, we-" before Naruto could finish his sentence two bowls of ramen were put in front of them.

"Here you go," was all Ichiraku said before he went to the back of the store. Looking to her left she saw Naruto was already done which seemed physically impossible but then again walking up walls doesn't seem possible so who is she to judge. Taking her chop sticks she slowly slurps the ramen and then stopped. Naruto looked at her for ten seconds before she gobbled down the entire thing.

"So I'm going to assume you liked it," Naruto said and Church who was inside Carolina (bow chicka bow wow) decided this would be a good moment to mess with her so he took control of her senses for a few seconds and made her say.

"Yea, I want to eat more as much as I want to fuck you," she/Church said which got a huge blush from Naruto.

"She wants the D!" Kurama screamed in his head.

"Uh I think I should go," Carolina said and was about to get up before a hand stopped her.

"Let me guess it was Church who made you say that," Naruto said.

"How did you know?" she asked.

"Well when you have a former demon inside your head telling you to do inappropriate things all the time you kind of know when someone has someone else doing shit like that to them."

"Oh well let's head back anyways I think it's about to rain," she said and Naruto looked up to see storm clouds coming their way.

"You're right so should we walk normally or fast way?"

"Hmm how about fast," that was all she said before Naruto picked her up and ran to the base.

(TIME SKIP TO MIDNIGHT)

Church and Kurama were outside of their person conversing. "Okay how about this I'll possess Lopez's body while you keep Naruto asleep and while you're doing that I'm going to going to move Carolina and keep her asleep to Naruto and put them in a "position" if you know what I mean," Church said.

"Genius let's get right on it," Kurama responded as he moved back to Naruto to keep him asleep while Church took control over Lopez's body and used one of the A.I he remembers to keep Carolina asleep. He then moved her to Naruto's bed and placed her on top of him while placing her hand down his pants and made her get a good grip on Naruto's dick then moved her waist on top of Naruto's mouth (69 but instead Carolinas using her hand and they're partially clothed).

(TIME SKIP MORNING)

"3, 2, 1 GO!" Church yelled as they allowed their person to wake up while recording what was about to happen.

As he opened his eyes Naruto knew there was something wrong if the weight on his chest meant anything and when he tried to move his head something kept him down. Looking down at his mouth he saw Carolina's waist on it. Moving her right leg so he could move his head he saw Carolina with her hand on his dick.

"Uh, Carolina what are you doing?" he asked and as soon as he asked her head went from looking at his dick to him with a huge massive blush.

"U-uh good morning," she said before getting up and had Church come out. "Church would you mind explaining this happen and I swear to God if you say you had any part in this I will make you watch the image of the two green spandex freaks hugging each other," she threatened and after one explanation of the night Kurama came out standing right besides Church. "YOU GUY'S ARE SO DEAD!" Carolina and Naruto yelled as they sent some of the worst images possible to them making them scream out in pain.

"WE'RE SORRY!" they yelled out and the images stopped.

"Good now if you ever do that again I'll kill you," Naruto and Carolina said at the same time as they got dressed and left to train for the next few months before the academy started.

AUTHORS NOTE

Hey guys it's the asshole of the century answering all your comment questions and concerns. To start off with the questions of the guest, yes I'm going to make the Uchiha a bitch but also the council, and no I won't add Fu and I don't think I'll do a harem but Naruto will have sex with lots of people because I know a majority of people on this website just want to read that you sick perverts. And then the comment from Lord-Chrono for the bit fast and crackish but good overall I say thank you and I know it's a little bit fast but try to understand this is my first story and I'm trying to go into detail every chapter so just bear with me. If you have any questions comments or concerns just leave a review every ones opinion matters (except mine). I do not own Naruto or Red vs Blue this is purely fan based.


	8. Chapter 8 two months later

CHAPTER 8

(TWO MONTHS)

Two months since the incident happen and everyone, besides Griff, trained to get ready for the academy. Naruto learned all water jutsus that were C-rank and lower, became faster and stronger, could us his suit to its full potential, and became an intermediate in the Fox style but still hasn't found a suitable secondary sword for his left hand. Carolina basically refined her normal skills and learned to access chakra. Everyone else was basically learned the same thing as Carolina. Now they're at the entrance to the academy suits off. Ever since the incident Naruto learned how to give each person the ability to turn the suit to a tattoo so they could take it off anytime. Tuckers was an energy sword that went from his elbow to the palm of his right hand, Cabooses tattoo was a tank that went on his forearm, Carolina's was her plasma rifle on her forearm, Washes was a combat knife, Sarges was a shotgun, Simmons was a rocket launcher, Griffs was a pelican (the ship), and Donuts was a sticky grenade. Washes normal attire was a gray jacket with a yellow shirt, gray pants with a yellow stripe going down each side, and gray shoes. Caboose wore a blue shirt, blue shorts, blue sneakers, and a blue hat. Sarge wore a red long sleeved shirt with a red chunin/jounin jacket over it with dog tags from his time in the military, black cargo pants, and black combat boots. Griff wore an orange sleeveless shirt that had a UNSC symbol on his right, brown pants, brown sneakers, and had a lit cigarette in his mouth. Simmons woe the same attire as Griff but his shirt was maroon and his pants and shoes were black. Finally Donut wore a pink hoodie with a pink shirt underneath, pink pants, and pink shoes (Lord have mercy). Everybody, besides Sarge who was too old to enter the academy (he's twenty) became an instructor and when the reds graduated he would take them as his team and Doc who works at the hospital (again lord have mercy), stood outside the academy. "Well what the fuck are we waiting for an invitation come on," Tucker said as he walked in with everybody walking behind him. "184, 185, 186, 187 hey guys I found it."

"Okay come on let's go in," Carolina said and kicked the door which broke it off the hinges and sailed through the classroom and through the wall.

"Damn woman was that necessary?" Griff asked as they walked in.

"Yes now come on," was all she said. Looking at the people in the class they saw a fat kid with spirals on his cheeks eating a bag of chips, a kid who was asleep on the desk and had the hairstyle of a pineapple, a emo looking kid who had the hair of a duck butt, a girl who was in the back and looked like she was about to faint, a kid who wore a coat and glasses that remained silent but had a buzzing sound around him, some kid who smelled like he bathed in his dumpster with a puppy on his head, and two girls that looked like they were about to rape the emo kid one had pink hair and the other blonde (If you can't guess who they are then you're stupid or I'm really bad at describing). The reds and blues took a seat in the back deciding to associate among the selves while they waited. Also during that time span Naruto learned that there was a device that could play music from where the reds and blues came from and he listened to it when he wasn't speaking or doing important shit. Right now he was listening to Saint Asonias song Let Me Live My Life.

 _I`m scared of the face in the mirror_

 _All the cracks in the glass getting clearer_

 _I always overthink make it so hard_

 _On no one else but myself_

 _Let me live my life_

 _I can go get my knife or_

 _I can pull out the one that you stuck in my back_

 _For my suffering you've got nothing to gain_

 _My pain is your entertainment_

 _I feel the fear in my head it`s so heavy_

 _Holding down both my hands to keep them steady_

 _When I stop shaking everything's so easy_

 _On myself no one else, so_

 _Let me live my life_

 _I can go get my knife or_

 _I can pull out the one that you stuck in my back_

 _For my suffering you've got nothing to gain_

 _My pain is your entertainment_

 _Let me live my life_

 _I can go get my knife or_

 _I can pull out the one that you stuck in my back_

 _For my suffering you've got nothing to gain_

 _My pain is your entertainment_

 _Let me live my life_

 _I can go get my knife or_

 _I can pull out the one that you stuck in my back_

 _For my suffering you've got nothing to gain_

 _My pain is your entertainment_

 _Let me live my life_

 _And pull out the knife_

 _You know the one that you stuck in my back_

 _The one that you stuck in my back_.

By the time the song was over the instructors entered the classroom one was a tan skinned man with a scar across his nose and pine apple hair that was brown, the other one had white hair and looked like an ass (Mizuki). "Okay class I am Iruka and this is Mizuki we will be your teachers for the next four years so let's start the day by assessing your skills in one on one spars," the now identified Iruka said as he exited the classroom with the class following behind him to the court yard. "First off it'll be Carolina vs Sakura." As they walked to the center Carolina realized Sakura was looking at the emo with her hearts in her eyes. "Ready set GO!" Iruka yelled but Sakura was still looking at the emo so Carolina ran at her and punched her in the face.

"OW WHAT WAS THAT FOR!" Sakura yelled which made everyone wince.

"Dear go do you know the definition of go?" Carolina asked.

"You should've let me get ready."

"Let you get ready for what, to rape the emo over there," and with that Sakura charged at Carolina and punched her in the chest. But that punch was like a punch from Simmons, sloppy and weak, but this was ten times worst. Carolina grabbed Sakura's arm snapped it in half and through her at Iruka. "I'll let you decide what should be done with her," Carolina said as she walked to the reds and blues.

"O-okay uh next is Griff vs Shikamaru," Iruka said not expecting the outcome of the fight.

"I forfeit," Griff and Shikamaru said as they laid under a tree not feeling like fighting.

"Ugh fine next match is Washington vs Kiba."

"Wahoo Akamaru this is going to be easy!" Kiba yelled as he went to the center of the ring.

"Oh man what the fuck do you bathe in, your dog's shit," Wash said insultingly which pissed Kiba off.

"GO!" and with that Kiba turned his nails to claws and tried to scratch Wash but Wash just ducked under the swipe and punched Kiba in the balls, hard. That made Kiba go down on the ground and Wash repeatedly stomped on Kiba's face until the only thing you could see was blood or foot prints. "Okay Wash I think that's enough," Iruka said slightly scared at how savage some of the kids could be. "Next is Choji vs Shino," Iruka said as they entered the arena. "GO!" Shino raised his hand and a bunch of bugs shot out from his sleeve and covered Choji.

"I surrender just get them off!" Choji yelled and the bugs then receded to Shino.

"Tucker vs Hinata," Iruka said as they entered the ring.

"So after I win you wanna bang?" Tucker asked perversely but stopped when Carolina and Naruto hit him in the head.

"Tucker I swear to God I'm going to kill you if you ask that question again," they threatened.

"Okay I get it," Tucker said.

"GO!" Iruka yelled and Hinata went to strike Tucker simply moved to the left tripped her took his sword out and pointed it to her neck.

"Do you submit?" he asked.

"NO!" she screamed as she put chakra to her palm and swiped at the blade, only for her hand to get chopped off as it made contact with the blade. "AHH!" she screamed.

"MEDICS!" Iruka yelled as he picked her up and two men ran forward. "Try to save her hand," Iruka instructed getting a nod from the two as one put the hand in a cooler of ice and ran to the infirmary. "Tucker was it necessary to cut her hand off?!"

"What she's the one that hit the blade it's not my fault she didn't surrender or that you didn't stop the match," Tucker said as he walked away.

"Damn it your right okay next match Sasuke vs Naruto," Iruka said as they walked to the center.

"Might as well surrender now or face the might of the Uchiha," Sasuke said in an all mighty tone which got a so cool from the fan girls.

"Uchiha, HA! What a joke they were probably the weakest clan out there I mean if they were so powerful how come they got slaughtered in one night by one sixteen year old (don't know how old Itachi was at the time so just deal with it)?" Naruto asked/insulted which got Sasuke trembling and before Iruka said go he flashed through a bunch of hand signs and yelled.

"Fire Style: Great Fire Ball No Jutsu!" and with that an average sized fireball came out.

"Water Style: Water Wall!" Naruto yelled as a wall of water protected him from the fire. "Water Style: Water Wave!" Naruto yelled as a huge waved formed from the air and hit Sasuke effectively knocking him out.

"W-winner Naruto," Iruka said in disbelief not only because he beat Sasuke but he also pulled water out of the atmosphere which no one has been able to do since the second. "Next is Ino vs Donut vs Simmons," Iruka said and all three formed a triangle around the middle. "GO!" Iruka yelled. Donut ran around screaming like a girl only to be shot down by Simmons laser eye (don't give a fuck if it's not RVB cannon, laser eye Simmons is a good idea) and Ino went to punch Simmons only for his eye to predict her movements and he side stepped and shot a laser at her back knocking her out. "Winner Simmons," Iruka said. "Okay next is Shino vs Naruto, BEGIN!" Iruka said.

"Water style: Water Geyser No Jutsu!" Naruto yelled as boiling water shot up from the ground below Shino.

"Iruka I give up the water drenched and burned my bugs making them ineffective," Shino said.

"Okay winner Naruto next is Wash vs Carolina, Begin!" Iruka said and Wash took out a knife from his jacket and threw it at Carolina only for her to catch it and throw back hitting him in the legs and while he was stuck she ran at him and gave him an upper cut followed by another then another until he was fifteen feet up in the air and he fell down on his leg making the knife go completely through and him screaming out in pain. "Winner Carolina, MEDICS!" Iruka said/yelled and the two from before picked Wash up and took him to the infirmary. "Okay next is Simmons vs Tucker, Begin!" Simmons immediately shot a laser at Tucker only for his sword to deflect it and send it right back at Simmons hitting him in the chest and knocking him out. "Winner Tucker next is Caboose vs Naruto, Begin!" Caboose immediately kicked the downed tucker then charged at Naruto. Naruto jumped up and used Cabooses open back to jump higher in the air.

"Water Style: Water Web No Jutsu!" Naruto yelled as a web of water hit Caboose which through him to the ground and slowly started to tighten around him until he was knocked out.

"Winner Naruto next is Carolina vs Tucker, Begin!" Iruka yelled and Tucker took out his sword and charged at Carolina.

"SWISH!" Tucker yelled as he swung at Carolina only for her to grab his arm and twist it. "SWISH!" he swung again and Carolina ducked and punched him in the balls. "STAB!" he went for the stab but she moved to the right and punched him in the face knocking him out.

"Winner Carolina next is Naruto vs Carolina, Begin!" Iruka yelled. Naruto knew if he stood any chance he would need to use his sword so he took it out and got in the fox style and rushed at Carolina he did a downward slash and as she moved to the right he used the sword as the center of gravity to jump and turn to the right to kick Carolina sending her back a few feet. Shaking off the kick she charged at him and rolled under his waist kicking him in the balls which sent him up a ten feet. Seeing as he had the superiority in the air he flashed through hand signs and yelled.

"Water Style: Water Web No Jutsu!" and like before the web shot at Carolina but she was too fast and moved before the web could hit her. As soon as he landed she ran at him full speed and sent a chakra enhanced punch at his face only for him to block with the flat of his blade and sweep her down on the ground and put the sword to her throat. "Give up?" he asked.

"Now why would I do that," She said as she disappeared and reappeared right behind him and gave him a chop to the neck knocking him out.

"W-winner Carolina," Iruka said because he had no doubt in his mind either of them could beat a Chunin. "Okay class that's it for today so you can go home, but tomorrow we will learn about history, politics, functions of the village, and other stuff," Iruka said as everyone left to go home.

"Come on Naruto time to head back to the base," Carolina said.

"Five more minutes," Naruto said.

"No now we're having dinner tonight remember," Carolina said, this was also a new thing that happened over the two months every week Naruto and Carolina would go eat at Ichirakus, and she kicked Naruto in the balls.

"OW dear God woman I swear you have an addiction to my balls," Naruto said as he got up but stopped when he saw Carolina give him a death stare. "U-uh what I meant is that you have an awesome kicking ability that makes all men fear you, mainly me," Naruto said but murmured the last part to himself.

"Good now come on we're going," Carolina said as they left to go eat.

AUTHORS NOTE

Hey I'm not dead yet assholes. Now the song I inserted earlier was Saint Asonia a recently formed band consisting of Adam Gontier former lead singer, rhythm guitarist and main song writer for Three days grace but is now part of Saint Asonia doing the same thing he did for Three Days Grace (The transaction still hurts), Mike Mushok, Corey Lowery, and Rich Beddoe. Note I don't sponsor or promote I'm just a fan. Now the only comment I've gotten is to add Samui to a Naruto harem from the Guest so what I'm going to do is make it fair since I was originally going to do and Naruto and Carolina relationship only is have a vote for a few people.

Samui

Temari

Yugito

Fu

Mabui

Kushina

And Anko

Only two will be added and the rest he will have sex with but not be in a relationship so CHOOSE FUCKING WISELY because I don't want hate comments. I don't own Naruto or Red vs Blue this is purely fan based. And to explain the water we it's basically a wide range attack that covers the opponent in a water web that is fortified by chakra and the only way to stop it is overwhelm it with greater chakra or use it's weakness Earth. That's it and I may not update for a while.


	9. Chapter nine love through snowballs?

CHAPTER NINE

(ONE YEAR AFTER ENTERING ACADEMY)

"Ugh why do we have do runs when it's fucking snowing," an orange hair person said.

"Griff stop complaining would you rather do this or go through "special" training with Carolina," a maroon one said while emphasizing special.

"Yea Griff it's just one hundred laps around the base," the blond whiskered one said.

"Easy for you stay mister unlimited stamina," Griff said. "Ah screw it I'm going to take a nap," not realizing that he should've kept running.

"Lazy ass," the blonde said as everyone kept running. After one hundred laps everyone, except Naruto, was on the ground breathing heavily.

"Okay people now that you're done with your warm ups I'll allow you to go inside and warm up," an aqua lady said as she walked into the base.

"Naruto your girlfriend is a bitch," an aqua male said.

"Dear God how many times do I have to tell you SHE'S NOT MY GIRLFRIEND!" Naruto yelled as everyone walked inside. Going into the living quarters everybody changed into their normal attire which was different than it was a year ago. Griff wore the same thing but had an orange hoodie. Simmons wore the same thing but had a maroon hoodie. Sarge still wore what he did last year saying that if it isn't broke don't fix it. The only difference in donut was a pink hat that said "Light red". Doc wore a black shirt and purple jacket, black jeans, black boots, and a purple beanie. Caboose wore the same thing but had dark blue cargo pants on. Tucker didn't change saying girls don't like change. Wash wore the same thing and Naruto dark blue long sleeved slim fit V-neck shirt, a dark blue coat with black waves on the bottom and had the kanji for water beast of the leaf (Like Naruto sage coat but the way I described it), dark blue fingerless gloves, dark blue cargo pants, and dark blue combat boots. (Okay before I get comments on why dark blue I'm just going to say sit down shut the fuck up and open your history books because back when there were ninja on our world they would wear dark blue because it blended in better with the darkness, there now go tell your parents what you learned) and then there was Carolina who wore an aqua short sleeved shirt, blue skinny jeans, blue sneakers, and her mother's earrings. Nothing really changed besides that Naruto learned all the water jutsus in the library and was now moving onto air jutsus and became an expert in the fox style but still didn't have an extra sword (It'll come soon) and became a master in sealing.

"Okay people since some of you have worked hard," Carolina said while looking at everybody but Griff. "We'll be taking a day off besides Griff."

"What why do I not get a day off?!" Griff complained as he woke up from his nap.

"Because you barely do anything so you will clean both the bases and shovel the snow off the roof," Carolina said.

"WHAT this is an outrage because one it's as messy as hell and two it's going to be snowing all day!" Griff said.

"Exactly," was what Carolina said with a smile and it grew when Griff left to go to the red base to clean up. "Okay feel free to do whatever you feel like," and with that everyone left to go do their own thing. Donut went to (Author shudders and refuses to write where donut goes because it would scar anyone for life), Simmons went to the library, Sarge went to the material shop, Washington went to the hospital to check up on his leg, Doc followed Wash, Tucker went to the streets trying to flirt with any girl who walked by him, key word trying, Caboose went to the strip club thinking it was a candy store, Carolina just read a book on the couch and Naruto just laid on his bed reading a book and listening to music.

 _This world will never be_

 _What I expected_

 _And if I don't belong_

 _Who would have guessed it?_

 _I will not leave alone_

 _Everything that I own_

 _To make you feel like it's not too late_

 _It's never too late_

 _[Chorus:]_

 _Even if I say!_

 _It'll be alright_

 _Still I hear you say_

 _You want to end your life_

 _Now and again we try_

 _To just stay alive_

 _Maybe we'll turn it all around_

 _'Cause it's not too late_

 _It's never too late_

 _No one will ever see_

 _This side reflected_

 _And if there's something wrong_

 _Who would have guessed it?_

 _And I have left alone_

 _Everything that I own_

 _To make you feel like_

 _It's not too late_

 _It's never too late_

 _[Chorus]_

 _The world we knew_

 _Won't come back_

 _The time we've lost_

 _Can't get it back_

 _The life we had_

 _Won't be ours again_

 _This world will never be_

 _What I expected_

 _And if I don't belong_

 _Even if I say_

 _It'll be alright_

 _Still I hear you say_

 _You want to end your life_

 _Now and again we try_

 _To just stay alive_

 _Maybe we'll turn it all around_

 _'Cause it's not too late_

 _It's never too late_

 _Maybe we'll turn it all around_

 _'Cause it's not too late_

 _It's never too late (It's never too late)_

 _It's not too late_

 _It's never too late_

He was happily listening to Three Days Grace Never Too Late until a pillow hit him in the face.

"Hey what was that for?!" he yelled.

"I'm bored," was Carolinas response as she got up and walked to Naruto. "Let's go do something," she said.

"Like what?" Naruto asked as she grabbed his arm and took him out side.

"Well how about we ice skate," Carolina said as she took two ice skating shoes (Not sure what you call them because I don't watch hockey and I live in Florida where there is no ice skating unless it's indoors).

"Or we could do THIS!" Naruto yelled the last part as he threw a snow ball at her. When it hit Carolina looked at him and said.

"Prepare to die!" and with that she threw tons of snowballs at him using her super speed to make and throw more.

"Water Style: Water Wall No Jutsu!" and with that a wall of water surrounded Naruto only for it to turn to clear ice because of the cold and the snowballs simply bounced off the wall. Carolina then added a bunch of chakra to a snowball (If chakra can be put into random objects I don't see why a snowball can't) and through it full force at the ice shattering it and hitting Naruto which sent him flying backwards and falling on the ground. Carolina then through a bunch of snow balls at him which created a hill on top of him.

"Next time pick a battle that you can win," she said as she walked to him waiting for him to get up but didn't expect him to put his hand on her leg and flip her over with Naruto on top of her.

"That's why I picked this one," he said as he looked at her hair which had bits and pieces of snow. Next thing to happen was a snowball hit Naruto in the head forcing his head down which made him put his lips on Carolinas and they stayed that way for about ten second until Naruto lifted his head up. "Uh sorry that wasn't meant to happen," he stuttered and was about to say more when Carolina pulled his head down and locked lips with him yet again and they had a hot make out session which probably make most men faint.

(RIGHT BEFORE THE SNOWBALL HIT THE HEAD)

Griff was shuffling snow off the base and it would just reappear and he was about to throw the shovel at something until Church appeared right beside him. "Hey Griff old buddy old pal can I ask a favor," Church said.

"What do you want now blue?" Griff asked in a bored tone.

"Well if you look down to your right you'll see Naruto and Carolina on the ground what I want you to do is throw a snowball at Naruto's head," Church explained.

"What do I get out of it?" Griff asked.

"You get to stop shoveling and I tell Carolina that I thought you were done, so how about it do we have a deal?"

"Fine deal," Griff said as he made a snow ball through it at Naruto's head and walked away.

(BACK WITH NARUTO)

After about twenty minutes of making out they just laid side by side panting because of how little breath they had left. "So what does this make us?" Naruto asked.

"Well this normally means that you're my boyfriend and I'm your girlfriend so I swear to God if you cheat on me I'm going to kill you," Carolina said/threatened. "Come on let's finish this inside" Carolina said as they went to continue what was happening before.

(WITH GRIFF)

"Why do I have a feeling that I set off a chain of events that will probably affect the future?" Griff asked no one in particular. "Whatever not my problem," was all he said as he went to sleep.

AUTHORS NOTE

Hello perverts of the internet I'm back. I apologize for the shortness of the chapter but today was just busy involving me waking up at seven going to surfing camp at eight and stayed there until one then I immediately went to the library to volunteer until three and then I had a doctor's appointment that went onto five and I had a bunch of shit to do at home. Okay I didn't get any questions but I want to give an award out for the longest (BOW CHICKA BOW WOW!) most confusing name on the internet which goes to 0zeroomegaouroboros (hope I spelled it right) Okay now that that's done let's see who currently stands in the harem

Fu three

Anko three

Samui two

Kushina one

Mabui one

Yugito zero

Temari zero

Remember no double voting but I have a question for Samianko (guest) in your vote you said Samui and Amok who is Amok did you accidentally spell Anko wrong? Again I don't own Naruto or Red vs Blue this is purely fan based.


	10. Chapter 10 graduation exam

CHAPTER 10

It's been three years since Naruto and Carolina became a couple and a lot has changed. First off is everybody learning their chakra element and jutsu to go along with it. Sarge had a fire element but preferred hand to hand combat, Simmons an earth element, Griff had a fire element and surprisingly a bloodline for ash and smoke, Tucker had a lightning element, Caboose had an air element, Doc had an earth element, Wash had a lightning element, and Carolina had a water element. Sarge became an expert in what he dubbed the shotgun style which required that in one single moment to land a series of hit on the enemy and was considered to be on par with might Guy and Tucker learned the Lion style which was a powerful style but could be predicted easy so to make up with that he added parts of the fox style to make it a little bit more unpredictable. Naruto learned all the elemental jutsus in the library and was a master in the fox style. Now everybody stood inside the classroom, besides Sarge who will be instructing the taijutsu section and Doc who is at the hospital taking a test to become a medic ninja, waiting for their teachers to arrive. "I'm hungry," Tucker complained.

"Would you shut up about that already I told you to eat breakfast but you chose to sleep an extra five minutes," Carolina said as she kicked Tucker in the balls.

"OW! You think after all these years a man would get used to getting kicked in the balls every day," Tucker said and was about to complain some more until the door slid open and three figures walked through.

"Good day class today will be graduation exam so I wish you the best of luck," Iruka said. "Starting off will be a test on the history of the leaf," he said which got a groan out of everyone as he passed out the papers. "You may start," and with that Naruto looked at the questions, who drew back the forces of Iwa during the third Great War is it A the first B the second C the third D the fourth or E Legend of Legend, Naruto easily finished the test in a minute and then put in his earphones to listen to music as he waited for everybody else to finish the test.

Hero by Skillet: I'm just a step away,

 _I'm a just a breath away;_

 _Losin my faith today,_

 _Falling off the edge today!_

 _I am just a man,_

 _Not superhuman;_

 _I'm not superhuman!_

 _Someone save me from the hate_

 _It's just another war,_

 _Just another family torn;_

 _I'm falling from my faith today!_

 _Just a step from the edge,_

 _Just another day in the world we live;_

 _I need a Hero,_

 _To save me now!_

 _I need a Hero!_

 _Save me now!_

 _I need a Hero,_

 _To save my life!_

 _A Hero'll save me!_

 _Just in time!_

 _I gotta fight today,_

 _To live another day;_

 _Speakin' my mind today,_

 _My voice will be heard today!_

 _I've gotta make a stand,_

 _But I am just a man;_

 _I'm not superhuman!_

 _My voice will be heard today!_

 _It's just another war,_

 _Just another family torn;_

 _My voice will be heard today!_

 _It's just another kill,_

 _The countdown begins to destroy ourselves!_

 _I need a Hero,_

 _To save me now!_

 _I need a Hero!_

 _Save me now!_

 _I need a Hero,_

 _To save my life!_

 _A Hero'll save me!_

 _Just in time!_

 _I need a Hero,_

 _To save my life!_

 _I need a Hero!_

 _Just in time!_

 _Save me just in time..._

 _Save me just in time..._

 _Who's gonna fight for what's right,_

 _Who's gonna help us survive,_

 _We're in the fight of our lives!_

 _And we're not ready to die!_

 _Who's gonna fight for the weak,_

 _Who's gonna make 'em believe,_

 _I've got a Hero!_

 _I've got a Hero!_

 _Livin' in me!_

 _I'm gonna fight for what's right,_

 _Today I'm speaking my mind,_

 _And if it kills me tonight,_

 _I will be ready to die!_

 _A Hero's not afraid to give His life,_

 _A Hero's gonna save me just in time!_

 _I need a Hero,_

 _To save me now!_

 _I need a Hero!_

 _Save me now!_

 _I need a Hero,_

 _To save my life!_

 _A Hero'll save me!_

 _Just in time!_

 _I need a Hero!_

 _Who's gonna fight for what's right,_

 _Who's gonna help us survive!_

 _I need a Hero!_

 _Who's gonna fight for the weak,_

 _Who's gonna make 'em believe!_

 _I need a Hero!_

 _I need a Hero!_

 _A Hero's gonna save me,_

 _Just in time!_

By the time the song was over he saw that the reds and blues were done and majority of the class was done and the only person left was Kiba who was stuck on question one. "Okay class time is up," Iruka said as a buzzer went off and he went to collect the papers. "Next off is the aiming section," Iruka said as they went outside to take the test. As soon as everyone left a figure emerged from the shadows gray goodie that said Venice blue jeans and blue shoes. Walking over to the stack of papers and went to see what everybody answered for the first question. He shuffled through the papers until he was on the final one, Kiba's paper. Looking at the answer he saw that he answered Legend of Legend. The figure fell to his knees and looked up to the skies, or ceiling, and yelled. "WHY DID IT HAVE TO BE KIBA!" and with that he melted into the shadows and left.

(OUTSIDE)

"Okay class there are one hundred targets you have to hit and you will be given fifty kunai and fifty shuriken starting off with Sasuke," Iruka said as Sasuke stepped forward and threw them all at once (Don't ask I don't know how either) and got a eighty out of one hundred. "Okay next is Kiba," Kiba stepped forward and wanting to show off did the exact same thing as Sasuke did but when he threw half of them fell to the floor and the other half had only ten that hit the targets. Everyone fell on the ground laughing at Kiba who mumbled angrily and stomped to his spot. "Next is Sakura," she stepped forward and through each weapon individually only scoring a forty five out of one hundred. "Next is Ino," she scored a forty seven out of one hundred. "Choji," he scored a sixty. "Shikamaru," he got a fifty saying it was too much of a drag to aim. "Hinata," she got a one hundred and walked away arrogantly. Now the change between the shy girl and the arrogant girl now happened when her hand got cut off and put back on. For punishment for losing to a commoner she had her hand cut off then placed back on repeatedly for hours until she fainted of blood loss and not only that they used a temporary caged bird seal to torture her for weeks until she became the Perfect Heir. "Shino," he scored an eighty five. "Griff," he scored a fifty five. "Simmons," Simmons used his cyborg eye to predict where the weapon would go and scored a one hundred. "Donut," Donut picked up the weapons held it wrong and through it like a baseball only scoring him a forty. "Tucker," he scored sixty nine and shouted bow chicka bow wow at the end. "Caboose," he scored a seventy five and the rest of the weapons hit the rest of the class. "Wash," he scored an eighty seven. "Carolina," and in two seconds she scored one hundred. "Finally Naruto," Naruto walked up to a kunai sent wind chakra to it and through it. It went through the dummy and using lightning chakra he guided it to hit all other one hundred targets. Walking back to Carolina he said.

"I think I out performed you."

"Okay class next is hand to hand combat and your instructor shall be Sarge," Iruka said as everyone walked to the field. Once there the soon to be ninja saw that there was a crowd filled with many people and the hokage standing on a podium talking to the crowd about will of fire and shit like that.

"Okay the first fight of the day will be Ino vs Sakura," Sarge said in disappointment knowing it would be a horrible fight. "Begin!" he yelled and the two charged at each other with a punch which knocked them both out getting may boos from the crowd. "Okay next fight is Choji vs Shikamaru Begin!" he said only for Choji to raise his hand in defeat.

"I can't hurt a friend," he said.

"Sheesh I swear everyone here is a pussy or incredibly weak," Sarge said. "Next match is Tucker vs Hinata Begin!" Hinata got in her family stance and tucker went into the freelancer style the left leg forward and the right leg back with the right arm at a ninety degree angle slightly forward of the left arm which was also at a ninety degree angle.

"So we're at it again how's your hand doing?" Tucker said/asked in a mocking way.

"Why you filth I'll end this in one attack!" she yelled and charged at him. Tucker used his left leg and right arm to block the attacks by swiping her arms away and avoiding the finger tips.

"My turn." He said when she was done and charged at her using his right leg for a kick sending her a few feet up in the air and using his left and right hands held her head and brought it down full force onto his left knee repeatedly until she was knocked out.

"Now that's what I call a fight nothing but pain and blood," Sarge said. "Next match is Shino vs Griff BEGIN!" he yelled and Shino charged at Griff with a punch only for Griff to be move his head to the left and gave Shino a chop to the neck making him get knocked out. "Wow dirt bag you did something successful in life someone get a camera," Sarge said sarcastically with fake tears rolling down his face.

"Fuck you to Sarge," Griff said as he went to a tree to take a nap.

"Next is Sasuke vs Carolina BEGIN!" Sarge shouted and Carolina immediately ran at Sasuke. But some pink haired civilian council through a banana peel (I know I'm so original) and through it where Carolina was heading making her slip and fall onto her back. Sasuke then pulled out four U shaped pieces of metal and stuck into the ground so that it would be on top of her arms and legs making her immobilized.

"You seem like such a strong women so I'll do you a favor I'll make you my wife and we can rebuild my clan," Sasuke said.

"Fuck you I'm in a relationship!" she yelled only to be slapped by him.

"Oh you mean the dobe why would you to be with him when you could be in a relationship with me an elite?" he questioned.

"Fuck you I'd rather die than be in a relationship with you!" she yelled only to have her stomach stomped on.

"To bad because what I want I get," and with that he pulled down her pants revealing her aqua panties and he lashed out his dick which some people laughed at since it was a few centimeters even when it stood at full attention. He pulled the panties down and was about to stick his dick into her vagina until a blur appeared and kicked him in the head, hard. Looking up he saw Naruto with Blood red eyes and still had slits looking at him with pure hate. "What's the matter dobe don't like the fact that your pet was about to be mind?!" Sasuke said mockingly and was about to continue until a fist hit his face which made him crash through the wall and entered the academy and Naruto followed him planning on hurting him.

"Sir, you can't possibly allow that thing hurt Sasuke!" the pink haired civilian said.

"And why not?" he questioned.

"Because Sasuke is the last Uchiha!" she screeched.

"So."

"We need him to strengthen the village so we can't allow him to be hurt!"

"Well from the way I see it the Uchiha should be sentenced to prison for attempted rape."

"That demon whore should be thankful that Sasuke even considered wanting to sleep with her!" and was about to scream more until a glowing blue blade was put at her neck.

"I don't care who that little prick is if you dare say he was in his rights to rape my friend then I will kill you," Tucker said in all seriousness.

"ANBU ARRESTTHIS CHILD FOR THREATNING A MEMBER OF THE CIVILIAN COUNCIL!" she screeched waiting for the anbu to arrest Tucker. Feeling the blade leave her neck she smiled smugly thinking she won until she felt the sword cut through her lower back paralyzing her from the waist down.

"I really hate your voice," Tucker said as she knocked her out.

"Medics heal her and then keep her at the hospital until I say so," the hokage ordered. "While I do hate her did you have to do that because now I'll have to hold a trial," the hokage said.

"I really don't give a shit," Tucker said as he walked to Carolina to make sure she's fine.

(WITH NARUTO)

"Uchiha I'm going to make you suffer!" Naruto yelled as he held Sasuke by the throat and repeatedly punched him in the gut until he was coughing up a large amount of blood.

"You're going to suffer dobe," Sasuke coughed out. "I have the council on my side and I will make you suffer and take that whore you have as my wife," he said confidently. Naruto then took a kunai out and held it under the Sasuke's balls.

"You know I would use my sword for this but I don't want to disgrace it by having it touch filth like you," Naruto said.

"What are you going to do cut them off," the Uchiha said sarcastically.

"Yes, that's exactly what I'm going to do," Naruto said darkly as he brought the kunai upwards which cut off the Sasuke's balls and dick.

"AHHHHHHHHHH YOU'RE GOING TO FUCKING PAY FOR THAT!" Sasuke yelled as he passed out and two medics walked in putting the small body part into a cup of ice (It's really small) and walked out with Sasuke on a stretcher.

(BACK OUTSIDE)

"Draw!" Sarge yelled and gave people time to calm down.

"Hey you okay?" Naruto asked Carolina who was sitting on a bench with Tucker patting her back.

"Yea," she lied and at this point Tucker went back to the crowd knowing that Naruto should be the one to handle this.

"No you're not all right," Naruto stated.

"I was scared," she admitted.

"Scared of what?"

"Scared that if the Uchiha had his way with me that you wouldn't care for me and would think I'm some type of whore or monster," she said as she buried herself in Naruto's chest and cried.

"Hey don't cry even if the Uchiha did have his way I would still love you and nothing will ever change that," Naruto said as he rubbed her head for a few minutes until she fell asleep. At that point Tucker came over and asked.

"How's she doing?"

"I think she's fine but could you do me a favor and watch her while she sleeps to make sure no one makes a move on her?" Naruto asked.

"Yea I'll do that," Tucker said as he stood by the bench and pulled his sword out.

"Thanks," was what Naruto said as he walked back to the crowd.

"Okay next is Naruto vs Kiba BEGIN!" Sarge yelled and Kiba had his puppy turn into a human and did a spiraling vortex that headed straight for Naruto. Naruto predicted when there was an opening in the vortex and when it was a few inches away from him he grabbed into it pulling Kiba out and threw him over his head. Walking up to Kiba who was still dazed he smashed his foot onto the back of Kiba's head and repeatedly did so until a large amount of cracks formed on the ground and blood seeped through them. "Winner by knockout Naruto!" Sarge yelled. "Next is Caboose vs Lopez (There was no one left to fight so why not) BEGIN!" Caboose immediately ran to the down Kiba and stomped on his head repeatedly saying that Tucker did it. Lopez charged at Caboose and tackled him to the ground only for Caboose to send a punch that went through the robots chest and effectively shutting him down.

"Now that wasn't nice Mr. Lopez," Caboose said.

"Winner Caboose!" Sarge yelled. "Come back tomorrow for results!" he yelled. Naruto immediately went back to Carolina picked her up bridal style and went back to the base to sleep.

AUTHORS NOTE

I died and came back from the dead and the only thing that kept me going was the thought of all my viewers or readers or whatever you consider yourself mourning over my loss and that I couldn't continue the series. I think I only got one question and that is from the guest that predicts I have one thing to say to your question HOW THE FUCK DO YOU PREDICT WHAT I'M GOING TO DO! So in other words yes for Naruto

And here's the latest update for the poll

Fu 3

Samui 5

Anko 7

Mabui 1

Kushina 2

Yugito 1

Temari zero (No one likes her apparently)

To answer on question I forgot from another guest Mei won't be added but she will make an appearance and Kaguya I know nothing about so sorry. I don't own Naruto or Red vs blue this is purely fan based.


	11. Chapter 11 dream team

CHAPTER 11

Naruto put Carolina in her bed and placed some blankets over her and was about to go to his bed when a hand stopped him. "Don't leave," Carolina mumbled.

"Okay," Naruto said as he got into the bed and pulled the blankets over him. Carolina then put her head on his chest and he wrapped his right arm around her and that's how they fell asleep.

(IN THE MORNING)

"KIT WAKE UP!" Kurama shouted.

"Why?" Naruto grumbled.

"Because your graduation is today."

"Oh yea," Naruto said as he shook Carolina. "Time to wake up princess."

"Five more minutes," she yawned.

"You're starting to sound like Tucker," Naruto said and laughed when she shot straight up and gave him a death glare.

"Don't ever say that again," she said coldly while getting off the bed to get dressed and eat breakfast. Once that was done they woke up the rest of the reds and blues to go to the academy.

As they walked down the streets to the academy a crowd of civilians filled up the streets blocking there way. "Would you be so kind as to move?" Carolina said.

"No we will not move we can't allow a demon to become a ninja!" a pink haired woman in a wheel chair shouted. "And once we kill the demon will take his demon whore and give her to the almighty Sasuke Uchiha ATTACK!" she screamed and all the civilians ran towards them while the pink haired one left.

"Earth Style: Box of Earth!" Simmons yelled as four walls rose up trapping the civilians.

"Ash Style: Ash Fall!" Griff yelled as Ash covered the civilians. "Fire Style: Fire ball no jutsu!" he yelled as a fire ball came at them burning a few civilians and igniting the ash so that it burned all the civilians to nothing. Simmons then pulled the wall down and allowed Naruto to wash away the remains with water.

"Water Style: Whirlpool No Jutsu!" Naruto yelled and a small whirlpool emerged from the ground sucking in the remains into the earth.

"Earth Style: Ground replacement No Jutsu!" Simmons yelled as the ground fixed itself and covering the hole the whirlpool made.

"Ugh this is such a drag," Griff said as they continued on.

"Stop complaining dirt bag," Sarge said. They continued the rest of the walk with no interference.

(AT THE ACADEMY)

As they entered the classroom they noticed all eyes were on them. Looking around they saw everyone, besides Shikamaru Choji and Shino, giving them a death glare mainly Sasuke though. Naruto just gave them all the middle finger and walked up to the seats. As Carolina walked past Sasuke and attempted to put her on his lap only for her to free her arm and give him a punch in the gut. "Bitch you will become my wife whether you like it or not," Sasuke said only to be punched by her again as she walked up the stairs and took a seat by Naruto and proceeded to talk to him.

After an hour of waiting the door slid open and Iruka and Sarge walked through. "Well congratulations class you all have passed the test and are officially ninja of the leaf," Iruka said happily getting cheers from everyone besides those who had a stick up there ass *cough*Hinata and Sasuke*Cough*. "Now to announce who was the best and the worst starting with the kunoichi, first is Carolina, Hinata, Sakura, Ino, random civilian no one gives a shit about and others," Iruka said and was about to continue when a fist slammed down on the desk.

"Iruka how is it that a commoner like her has a better score than me?!" Hinata yelled in outrage while saying commoner with as much venom as possible.

"Well Hinata that's because she actually took time to practice and study while you went around thinking that your family name makes you better than everyone else so that you don't have to practice," Iruka said which enraged Hinata further but she kept her mouth shut. "Next is the shinobi First place is Naruto, then Washington, then Tucker, Simmons, Caboose, Simmons, Griff, Donut, Sasuke, Shino, Shikamaru, Choji, and Kiba." And was about to say more when yet again a fist or two slammed onto the desk.

"How did I come in last I'm clearly the alpha!" Kiba yelled.

"You insult me mutt," Church said from inside Carolina getting a smirk out of her.

"Well Kiba for one your aim was horrible you got demolished by Naruto and you didn't make it passed the first question on the test I mean come on it was obviously the fourth but you answered legend of legend, I mean from the sound of his name he sounds like a loser," Iruka said (Author cries in the corner complaining about the unfairness of life).

"But how did I lose to the odd squad when I an Uchiha is clearly the elite!" Sasuke yelled.

"Because they were better than you," Sarge said and Sasuke jumped out of his chair wanting to run to the council and demand a retest (what a fucking ass) until he heard a pump and looking around he saw that Sarge was holding some type of weapon and aiming it at his face. "Sit the fuck down son," Sarge said.

"NO I DON'T HAVE TO LISTEN TO ANY OF YOU I'M AN ELITE AND IF ANY HARM COMES TO ME KNOW THAT THE COUNCIL WILL KNOW!" Sasuke yelled only to feel a great amount of pain come from his arm. Looking down he saw that his arm was bleeding heavily and looked like they held small pieces of something. Sarge then lifted his shotgun high in the air and slammed it down on the Uchiha's head knocking him out, leaving blood gushing out, and hopefully giving him brain damage.

"Respect your superiors," Sarge said as he spat on the Uchiha's opened wound.

"MEDICS!" Iruka yelled and the two from yesterday appeared taking the Uchiha to the hospital but before they could a hand stopped them.

"Give him to a man named Doc," Sarge said to which they nodded and hurried to Doc.

"Why Doc in particular Sarge?" Iruka asked.

"Because he became a medic ninja yesterday and I thought he could use a patient," he explained which got the reds and blues to shudder because they knew how bad of a medic Doc could be.

"Anyways team one is… team seven is Sasuke Uchiha, Sakura Haruno, and Riley Jones. Team eight is Hinata Hyuuga, Kiba Inuzuka, and Shino Aburame. Team ten is Shikamaru Nara, Choji Akimichi, and Ino Yamanaka. Team Red is Griff, Donut, and Simmons, Team Blue is Caboose, Tucker, and Doc. Team freelancer is Carolina, Washington, and Naruto your sensei's should arrive shortly."

After ten minutes four individuals walked in. One wore a standard Jonin outfit a cigarette in his mouth a sash on his waist and had a beard. The next was a woman who had red eyes black hair that reached to the middle of her back and a white and red outfit. The next wore an entirely blue Jonin outfit brown hair and charcoal eyes. The final one wore a dark red long sleeved slim V-neck shirt a red Jonin vest over it Black Cargo pants Black combat boots Red hair and red eyes that had slits. "Team ten follow me to training ground fifteen," the smoker said as he walked out with the team behind him.

"Team eight follow me to training ground seventeen," the red eyed women said as she left.

"Team Blue follow me to training ground five," the Blonde one said.

"Red team you know where to meet," Sarge said.

"Team Freelancer we meet at blue base," the red hair one said.

(AT BLUE BASE)

"Okay team how about we introduce ourselves I'll start off I'm Kurama I like some things, I dislike other things, my hobbies include fucking with people and "fucking" people, and my dream for the future is none of your business," Kurama said.

"Wow Kurama I give you a body and that's what you use it for fucking people," Naruto said.

"Hey I've been in this body for a week and I've already had sex while you have had your body for fourteen years and you still haven't had sex with your mate," Kurama said which got Naruto and Carolina to blush and Washington to be propelled backwards by a major nose bleed thinking of his two friends having sex. "Okay Naruto you can go first," Kurama said.

"Okay, I like my girlfriend, training, ramen, my friends, and my annoying A.I."

"Love you to kit."

"I dislike arrogance, those who hurt innocent people, and the Uchiha, my hobbies include training and reading, and my dream for the future is to have a family," Naruto said which got Carolina blushing and Washington losing more blood from nosebleed.

"Next is Carolina."

"I like my boyfriend, my friends, my A.I, and chocolate, I dislike the Uchiha, fan girls, and perverts."

(AT TRAINING GROUND FIVE)

"ACHOO!" Tucker sneezed.

"Hey Tucker do you have a cold?" Doc asked.

"Na I think someone is talking about me hopefully it's a hot babe," Tucker said with hope in his eyes.

(BACK AT BLUE BASE)

"My hobbies include training and hanging out with friends, and my dream for the future is to start a family with someone in particular," she said while looking at Naruto who blushed so hard it put a tomato to shame and Wash to lose more blood.

"Okay next is Washington," Kurama said.

"Uh I like my friends and training, I dislike the Uchiha, and my hobbies are training and watching movies, and my dream for the future would probably be to redeem myself for the mistakes I made in the past," Wash said.

"Good now that we know each other we'll take a test which is to steal the reds flag before they steal our flag," Kurama explained. "Your test starts NOW!" he yelled as he ran out of the building.

"Okay here's what we'll do, Naruto you and I will infiltrate the base while Wash guards are base, then we knock out who ever we see and go to the flag, once there you'll take it and place it in a scroll use a clone and have it henge into the flag so that they don't know what's going on," Carolina explained.

"Why do I get guard duty?" Wash complained.

"Because Naruto and I are better than you at stealth," Carolina said.

"Sure I think you just want some alone time with your boyfriend so you can start a "Family" in the woods," Wash said and was kicked in the balls by Carolina who was blushing up a storm.

"Wash shut up or I'll kill you," she said darkly getting Wash to run up to the top of the base to do guard duty.

"Remind me never to piss you off," Naruto said as they walked out of the base.

As they snuck to the red base they cleverly avoided any traps that were set up by the reds and made it to the wall of the red base. Using chakra to climb up the wall they saw Donut looking in the opposite direction of them. Carolina then pulled out a plasma grenade and threw it at Donut's head.

"GET IT OFF IT'S A BLUE SPIDER!" Donut yelled while running around but then stopped. "Wait a minute the only blue spider I know is the one that Texas through at me when I arrived at blood gulch so that can only mean this is a grenade." Donut said to himself but he was to slow to take it off BOOM the grenade exploded knocking him out.

"Sheesh you're brutal," Naruto said.

"I didn't see you disagreeing with me," she said.

"Yea because you didn't tell me what you were going to do."

"Whatever let's get the flag already," Carolina said as she jumped through the hole in the roof with Naruto following. Once they landed they saw the red flag somehow waving even though there was no wind. Naruto went to the flag and sealed it up.

"Shadow clone jutsu," Naruto said as a replica of himself appeared in a poof of smoke. The clone then used the henge technique and turned itself into the flag. They then jumped out of the base and went back to blue base.

"Well that took longer than expected did you actually take my advice?" Kurama asked.

"No we just had some complications," Naruto said as he unsealed the flag.

"Well whatever here is your bandanna or whatever the fuck you humans call them," Kurama said as he handed it to them. Naruto placed it around his waist like a belt, Carolina put hers on her left arm, and Wash put his on his right arm. "Now let me get something to drink," Kurama said but stopped when he heard footsteps coming into the base. Turning around he saw it was an anbu.

"Naruto Uzumaki and team you are summoned by the hokage and council to face trial against Sasuke Uchiha," he said as he grabbed them and shunshined to the council.

AUTHORS NOTE

Hey guys I'm back and might update later today. Just one comment from jodhhops to if armor becomes a factor can you give Naruto fotus. Well if you read the earlier chapters you would see that the armor is a factor in the series. Naruto has agent Locke's armor from halo five but it's pitch black and they don't where it because they don't want to reveal too much to the villagers about where they came from. Now I would put up the poll but I'm going to be an ass and show it to you next chapter but keep voting because it will last the next three chapters or so. I don't own Naruto or Red vs Blue this is purely fan based


	12. Chapter 12 trial

CHAPTER TWELVE

(AT THE COUNCIL ROOM)

Appearing in the middle of the room Naruto, Carolina, Washington, and Kurama looked around to see the rest of the reds and blues standing by then, they saw a table in the shape of a U and the hokage and his advisors sitting by him. Sitting in the U table the civilian council and Shinobi council sat there with their children standing by them.

"Naruto Uzumaki and friends you are faced with the accusation of killing civilians and harming Sasuke Uchiha what say you in your defense?" the hokage explained/asked.

"SARUTOBI YOU'RE GIVING THE DEMON THE RIGHT TO DEFEND HIMSELF HE SHOULD BE SENTENCED TO DEATH!" the same pink haired lady said from before.

"That is hokage-sama to you Haruno!" the hokage said while blasting his killing intent making the civilian council piss themselves. "You may continue Naruto."

"Well what happened with the attack of the almighty cock sucker Sasuke Uchiha was that he tried to rape my girlfriend when she was down," Naruto said.

"THAT'S UCHIHA-SAMA TO YOU DEMON BRAT!" Haruno yelled.

"HARUNO IF YOU CALL NARUTO A DEMON ONE MORE TIME I WILL PERSONALLY KILL YOU!" the hokage yelled. "Carolina what's your side of the story?"

"Well during the spar with Sasuke the civilian council member Haruno interfered with the match causing me to fall on my back, the Uchiha then took out four U shaped pieces of metal and stuck it into the ground on top of my arms and legs, he then proceeded to try to rape me and would've if Naruto didn't stop him," Carolina explained.

"HA WE GOT YOU NOW WITH YOUR LIES BECAUSE THE GREAT UCHIHA HAS TOLD US THAT HE SIMPLY PUT CHAKRA CONDUCTING METAL ON YOU SO YOU WOULD PASS OUT NOTHING MORE NOTHING LESS, ANBU ARREST THEM!" Haruno yelled and six anbu jumped down and were about to knock the reds and blues out until three sounds were heard. One was a swoosh, a loud bang, and the sound of metal ripping through multiple pieces of flesh. Looking at the sound they saw that one anbu had a glowing sword go through him, one had a huge bleeding hole in his gut, and the others had their heads cut off by a sword with a dragon on the blade. The one holding the blade looked at the lady with so much hate it made Kurama back away slowly.

"Haruno shut the fuck up before I kill you," Naruto said.

"WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE NARUTO TALKING TO MY MOTHER LIKE THAT!" a voice yelled and looking to the side they saw Sakura Haruno yelling at them. She then charged at them with a kunai only to be knocked out by a chop to the neck by Carolina.

"HARUNO IF YOU DARE ORDER WHAT MY ANBU TO DO YOU WILL SPEND THE REST OF YOUR LIFE WITH ANKO!" the hokage yelled. "Now shut up, next is Sasuke Uchiha's turn to talk," and with that Sasuke Uchiha walked to the middle arrogantly.

"It's like Haruno said it was just chakra conducting metal to slowly drain her chakra until she passed out," Sasuke said confident that he would walk away free, Carolina his sex servant, and Naruto in chains. Until a major blast of KI came from the shinobi council and the hokage.

"Sasuke Uchiha the shinobi here aren't as stupid as the civilians we saw you attempt to rape Carolina and not only that you have the non-existent balls to lie to our faces," hokage said angrily.

"So what I'm Uchiha of anything I should be sitting where you are old geezer because unlike you or anyone else I'm elite so I say let's just skip the trial make me the leader, kill Naruto, and make Carolina my bitch because I'm sure the council would agree with me," the Uchiha said smugly getting nods of agreements from the civilians. He was going to say more until a hand grabbed his throat and squeezed it hard while punching him in the gut.

"I don't give a damn if you're Uchiha if you ever disrespect me you'll die," the hokage said only for a blood filled spit to hit him in the eye.

"Get your senile old hands off me and as the acting leader I command you to leave the village," the Uchiha said again getting nods of agreements from the civilians. He would've said more until a sword stabbed him through the stomach.

"Fuck off Uchiha," Naruto said as Sasuke passed out.

"Medics take him to the hospital and make sure he gets healed slowly and painfully," the hokage said coldly. "Now is there anything else anyone would like to say before the meeting is dispatched?" he asked.

"OF COURSE WE SHOULD KILL THE DEMON FOR ATTACKING OUR REAL LEADER AND SHOULD WORK ON MAKING HIS DEMON WHORE SASUKE'S SEX SLAVE AND THERE IS STILL THE MATTER OF THE DEMON ATTACKING RANDOM CIVILIANS FOR HIS PLEASURE!" Haruno yelled making all the other civilians shout in agreement yelling stuff like death to the demon or sex for the Uchiha. They would've continued until a sword slashed all their heads off stopping at Haruno. "SEE HE SHOWS HIS TRUE COLORS HE IS THE NINE TAILED DEMON FOX REINCARNATED!" she yelled before being knocked out.

"Hokage-sama I request that I personally torture her for acts of treason and revealing an S-class secret," Naruto said.

"Permission granted," the hokage said and Naruto picked up the last surviving civilian council member and took her to the storage room.

(TWO HOURS LATER)

Naruto and Kurama walked out of the room and back into the meeting room. "Are you done Naruto?" the hokage asked.

"Yes and just to answer any questions, yes she's dead, No Carolina will not become the Uchiha's property, and yes I killed civilians but out of self-defense," Naruto said.

"YOU DID WHAT!" Sakura yelled while running to the storage room to see if her mother was dead (I don't feel pity) and fell on her knees seeing that her mother was dead.

"Meeting adjourned Naruto and friends will not be charged but Sasuke Uchiha and Sakura Haruno will head back to the academy for a year and both will be put under house arrest for treason and attempted rape," the hokage said. With that the Reds and Blues headed back to the base to describe the events of today.

AUTHORS NOTE

Ugh not going to say an awesome intro that makes everyone want to kill me. Comments and questions, Joshhpops for when is the nasty sex going to happen. I don't know because the thing is it would feel wrong because of my age because I'm not an adult I'm not a child either I'm only fifteen so it would feel awkward so I'll leave a vote but just saying I really, really, really don't want to write sex scenes. I know I'll probably lose a bunch of followers and favorites from viewers because of my age. Final question is from the predicting guest yes I added your sister's vote and if I ever need a Beta rider I'll contact you. Results for harem will be next chapter and results for sex scenes or lemons will be in a few chapters. I don't own Naruto or Red vs Blue this is purely fan based.


	13. NEVER MIND

Actually I won't go with lemons and if I do I'm having someone else wright it and to Drage I removed the torture scene because looking back I realized it was weird and wrong. Oh and thanks josh pops I'll always try to answer reviews. Poll for harem

Fu 5

Anko 8

Samui 7

Yugito 1

Kushina 2

Mabui 1

Temari 0


	14. Chapter 13

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

(One year later)

A year has passed and not much has really changed. Naruto and Carolina still dated, Griff and Simmons became the best tag team duo, Donut was still Donut, Sarge still had a boner for murder, Tucker was still single and ready to mingle, Caboose still hurt allies, Washington lost a lot of blood do to Carolina's relationship, and Doc somehow became the best medic ninja in the leaf (Don't ask I don't know how either). Now everyone was standing in front of the hokage. "Blue team you will help pack medical supplies at the hospital, red team you will kill a bandit camp eleven mile east of here, and team freelancer you will have a day off but Naruto must stay here," the hokage said.

"Okay you three now let's go pack the medical equipment and if anything is wrong don't hesitate to tell me," the blue team leader said in a sweet voice.

"Uh captain flowers why do we have to pack the gear at the hospital when they have their own medics like Doc to do it?" Tucker asked as they walked out and nobody heard flowers answer.

"Blood and violence I love this mission already!" Sarge yelled as they exited the building.

"Naruto make sure not to make any short trips on the way home because we have dinner tonight," Carolina said as she and the rest of the team walked out.

"So what do you need me to do old man?" Naruto asked.

"Well the thing is that team seven has recently lost a member so they need a temporary member until we find a new one so for one C-rank mission you shall accompany them," the hokage explained.

"Please tell me it was the Uchiha that died," Naruto said with hope.

"No it was Riley Jones."

"How did he die?"

"While on their first D-rank mission for capturing Tora the cat Riley caught it but she clawed violently and sliced Riley's throat making a really deep gash which later killed him," the hokage explained and Naruto burst out laughing. "You know it's not funny that someone died."

"Yea but the fact that it was killed by the cat is hilarious," Naruto said. Hearing footsteps he quickly composed himself. Entering through the door was team seven.

"Team seven reporting for duty," a laid back voice said that belonged to the one with gravity defying hair.

"Ah Kakashi here is your replacement member but he will only stay with you for this mission," the hokage said.

"Like we need him I'm an Uchiha an elite this mission doesn't required a clan less loser like him here," Sasuke said getting Sakura to drool and bow down to him.

"Hmm clan less you say, old man can you tell me the requirements of a clan?" Naruto asked.

"First requirement is that the clan must have over twenty members, second is that they must own a compound to fit everyone in, and thirdly some type of bloodline or jutsu only known to the family," the hokage explained.

"So as you see Sasuke you only apply to the compound requirement, you don't apply to the first because of the massacre and you don't belong to the third since you haven't activated your pathetic eyes yet and the only one who does is a missing-nin, so technically you're as clan less as me," Naruto said which made the Uchiha fume. Before Sasuke could do anything Kakashi placed a firm grip on his shoulder and told him not to do anything rash.

"Bring in the client," the hokage said and a drunk old man came in.

"These brats are supposed to protect me the pink one looks like she once to get raped by the enemy then fight them, the emo looks like he would die if he fought a cat, but the blond hair brat actually looks okay," the old man said getting three reactions. Sakura nodding her head yes, Sasuke being held back by Kakashi, and Naruto smiling at the man and giving him a thumbs up.

"Okay team we leave in five minutes so meet me at the west gate," Kakashi said as he and everybody else left.

AUTHORS NOTE

Hey you guys this time I really do apologize for the shortness of the chapter but I'm not feeling well so I just wanted to update with what will happen in later with this chapter. I'll answer the comments and questions next time because my eyes are starting to close for like a minute and then open up for five seconds so that isn't good. Final thing is that if you're an elder scrolls online fan or Pokémon fan I'll be doing this story and those two genres as stories, not as crossovers though. This is purely fan based.


	15. Chapter 14 new eyes

CHAPTER 14

(At the gate)

Naruto, Sasuke, Sakura, Kakashi, and Tazuna were at the gate getting clearance to go. "Okay everybody do you have what you need?" Kakashi asked as he walked up to them and they all said yes.

"NARUTO YOU IDIOT WHERE IS YOUR STUFF!" Sakura yelled which got those who weren't used to it cover their ears as they bled.

"Well Sakura instead of carrying all my items in a bag I seal them in scrolls," Naruto explained as if it was the easiest thing in the world and was about to walk out the gate until a hand grabbed his shoulder.

"Teach me how to do it," Sasuke demanded.

"YEA TELL SASUKE HOW TO DO IT!" Sakura yelled. Naruto then grabbed Sasuke's arm and threw him onto the ground. Hard.

"Uchiha, I don't see any reason that I have to teach you how to seal," Naruto said.

"You have to because I'm the village leader," Sasuke said smugly but was punched in the face.

"Wow some village leader you are," Naruto said sarcastically. Sasuke was about to attack but someone grabbed his shoulder.

"Now, now Sasuke this is an act of treason and assault anymore and I will take you back to the academy, do I make myself clear," Kakashi said which got a nod out of Sasuke. "Good, now let's continue," Kakashi said and they started heading down the trail.

(FOUR HOURS LATER)

Walking down the path (of life) we see Naruto actually doing his job, Kakashi reading his porn, Sasuke demanding someone to teach him, Sakura trying to flirt with Sasuke and was failing miserably, and Tazuna regretted hiring ninja in the first place. Then all of a sudden two figures jumped out of a puddle that was in front of them and sliced Kakashi to bits. "You're next," one of them said as they charged at Tazuna. But then someone jumped in between them and kicked them in the head. The figure then pulled out a sword and sliced the one on the rights head off and used the hilt of the sword to knock out the one on the left.

"Good job Naruto," Kakashi said as he walked out of some bushes.

"HOW ARE YOU ALIVE?!" Sakura yelled.

"Dear God do you not know the meaning of stealth?" Naruto asked in an annoyed tone.

"WHY WOULD I NEED TO BE STEALTHY WHEN SASUKE CAN SAVE ME!" she yelled.

"Whatever not my team you're endangering," Naruto said. "Any ways Kakashi can I interrogate the knocked out one?" Naruto asked.

"Sure but hurry up we're on a tight schedule here," Kakashi said as Naruto took the knocked out on to the forest.

"Okay well might as well try these out," Naruto said as his eyes morphed. They stayed dark blue but the slits in his eyes became three tomoe (Imagine a fully matured sharinagan but dark blue). "Nightmare of Hell no jutsu," Naruto whispered as he looked into the now waking up prisoner.

(INSIDE THE GENJUTSU)

Looking around the prisoner (I can't find his name anywhere on the internet) saw that he was inside a volcano that looked like it could blow up at any time. Then there was a horrifying screech that made him deaf. Looking up he saw an animal that looked like an overgrown demonic bat. The animal then started to choke up something and spat it on the ground. Looking at where the animal spat he saw his brother with pale ghostly eyes and pale skin. "Why did you let me die?" his brother asked.

"It wasn't supposed to happen," the prisoner said.

"Not good enough!" the brother yelled as magma started spewing upwards and the people the prisoner has killed or let die came crawling out of the lava. "Now it's our turn!" they yelled as they started beating him. But then it all stopped.

"I can make this stop if you answer my questions," a new voice said.

"I'll do anything just make sure they don't come back," the prisoner said.

"Okay my two questions are who do you work for and who are your accomplices?"

"I work for Gato and my accomplices are some weird bloodline freak and the demon of the mist."

"Good," was all the voice said and the people the prisoner killed started coming again

(REAL WORLD)

"Probably should kill him," Naruto said as he sliced off the prisoners head and changed his eyes to normal. "Man the eyes come in handy sometime," Naruto said as he thought about how he got them.

(FLASHBACK)

Naruto was laying on his back and Carolina on his chest as they were in a heated make out session and probably would've gone further until a voice interrupted them "Hold on before you do any of that stuff I'm going to need to talk to Naruto," Kurama said as he appeared in his hologram form.

"Ugh what is it Kurama?" Naruto asked.

"It's about your bloodline," Kurama said and both looked at him in shock.

"I'll leave you be," Carolina said as she walked out the living quarters.

"Okay your bloodline is very weird and you got it from your mother's side, it is known as the rinnegan and it is only given to the successor of the sage," Kurama explained. "You see the sage had a third child and when he was about to die he told the third child that on pf his descendants shall have his eyes but they will be better."

"Well then that means I have his eyes right?" Naruto asked.

"Yes but instead of getting just the rinnegan you get all bloodline that originated from the sage, like ice release, wood release, and others but some you won't have like the Akimichis body release which isn't combining two elements it is basically using the cells in your body and expanding them to make them bigger and only their cells can do it because it's their blood line," Kurama said. "Now what you need to do is send chakra to your eyes," and with that Naruto sent chakra to his eyes which morphed into the beginning sharinagan. "Hmm this is interesting I guess these are the eyes you work with but later on they will change to the rinnegan," Kurama explained.

"Okay well let's train," Naruto said as he got up.

(FLASHBACK END)

"Should probably head back to the group," Naruto said to himself as he walked back.

AUTHORS NOTE

Hey guys sorry for the delay and how short the chapter is thing is I was not feeling well and when I felt better it was immediately doing stuff like back to school stuff and finding out where all my classes are at high school (It's a very big school). I'm surprise I have time to write right now. Anyways I have no questions I think and if I do or haven't answered your question from before just ask it again and the harem winners will be announced next chapters so put all of your votes in. I do not own Naruto or red vs blue this is purely fan based. Sadly.


	16. Chapter 15

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

"Well Naruto that was fast," Kakashi said.

"Well for a C-rank missing-nin I was surprised by how easily he fell into a genjutsu," Naruto said. "Anyways I found out that he worked for the demon of the mist and someone with a bloodline and accepted a job from Gato to kill Tazuna," Naruto explained.

"So Tazuna what do you have to say," Kakashi said in a serious tone (Insert Tazuna sob story).

"So will you please help me," Tazuna begged.

"No, it's obvious that you are weak and Gato is strong, and the weak serve the strong so we should kill you for Gato," Sasuke as he took out a kunai only to be stopped by Kakashi.

"Sasuke we have your vote, Sakura what do you say?" Kakashi asked.

"I say the same thing as Sasuke," Sakura said with hearts in her eyes.

"Ugh, Naruto what about you?"

"We continue the mission," Naruto said.

"Well it's two to one so we head back, sorry Tazuna but you're on your own from here," Kakashi said as he walked away with the team into the sunset that appeared out of nowhere to make things loom dramatic.

"Oh God I'm so dead," Tazuna said and then there was a rustle in the bushes near him. "Who's there?!" Tazuna asked and out from the bushes came Naruto.

"Wow for an A-ranked ninja Kakashi is pretty dumb if he can't tell the difference between a shadow clone and the real one," Naruto said in disapproval.

"B-but I saw you over there with your team," Tazuna said in shock as he pointed to where team seven was.

"Again it was a shadow clone," Naruto said but only got a confused stare from Tazuna. "It's a solid clone," Naruto explained but still got a confused look. "Ugh I have a twin," Naruto lied and Tazuna gave an understanding look. "Anyways since my team is leaving I've decided to help you out until you finish your bridge and Gato is dead," Naruto said.

"Your funeral," Tazuna said as he walked forward.

"You know you could at least say thanks or something more positive," Naruto said.

"Whatever," Tazuna said as they walked.

(MIDNIGHT)

"Tazuna where is the boat?" Naruto asked.

"I don't know he said to meet him here," Tazuna said as a fog started to surround them.

"I'm afraid that your friend won't be coming here," A ruff voice said and Naruto pulled out his sword.

"WHO'S THERE!" he yelled as he blocked an attack from the side.

"Hmm you actually blocked my attack while you can't see you rather have some skill or good luck," the voice said.

Man I'm actually happy Kurama made me spar with him blindfolded for once, Naruto thought.

"You're welcome," Kurama said inside Naruto as he blocked another slash.

Shut it fox, Naruto thought/said as he blocked blow after blow.

"You interest me kid let's fight face to face," the voice said as the fog dispersed showing the demon of the mist himself.

"Wow totally didn't know it was Zabuza demon of the mist," Naruto said in sarcasm.

"You have spunk I'll give you that but let's fight!" Zabuza yelled as he jumped up and did a downward slash at Naruto. Naruto held his sword out like he was a going to but at the last second slid his body to the left and watched as the huge blade stuck itself into the ground. Naruto then rushed forward at Zabuza and was about to chop off his head when the huge blade blocked the blow and pushed him back sending him tumbling ten feet until he hit a tree. When he got up he charged at Zabuza and they met blow for blow, strike for strike, and slash for slash for about an hour until they both were pretty exhausted.

"Your good kid really good but this ends now," Zabuza said as he gripped his blade with both hands and charged forward. Naruto sent chakra to his blade and it glowed a neon red and grew a few inches and he too charged forward. When their blades met there was an explosion of white energy that would send most people flying but they stayed their ground. The white energy was still surrounding them as the swords were still lock neither giving in to the other. If one was to look above the battle they would see some type of aura above them that formed into a red fox and blue wolf butting heads with each other. The energy was so great it ripped some parts of their clothes off and burnt them. Finally Zabuza's blade started to crack which made Zabuza widen his eyes in shock and distract him for half a second before he went back to focusing. But half a second was all Naruto needed as Naruto surged forward and stabbed Zabuza through the stomach and they fell to the ground. The energy that surrounded them gave one last pulse before dissipating that sent both crashing through ten trees. Getting up Naruto hobbled over to Zabuza and pulled the sword out of the dyeing Zabuza. He was about to cut his head off when some hunter-nin appeared out of nowhere, picked Zabuza up, and disappeared in an ice shunshin. Naruto then passed out but before he entered the darkness he saw two people catch him before he hit the ground.

AUTHORS NOTE

Hey guys sorry for the long update but I've had lots of stuff to do and a high school to check out for when school start. Any ways to answer a question I got about Kyuubi being infused with the A.I's, yes we will see them again but it's going to be awhile and their maybe a Tex x Naruto but I haven't decided yet. And to Agent Hops comment about giving him the dojutsu out of the blue, I did this for the whole sage saying shit about eyes better than his so I thought a better Rinnegan would be okay because God knows I can't be original and he'll have to work hard for them and the eyes won't automatically make him supreme bad ass of the world their just a tool that he needs to use to help him. So today I announce the winners of the Harem so can I get a drumroll please, nothing, a drum roll please, still nothing, Ugh what is the audio crew doing?!

You don't have an audio crew dumbass you're too poor!

Fuck you random viewer that somehow knows where I live and is not a figment of my imagination because I'm lonely! So back to the topic the winners are Samui and Anko with Fu in second, Kushina in third, Yugito fourth, Mabui in fifth, and Temari with a whopping zero takes last place. There are the results and I don't own Naruto or Red vs Blue this is purely fan based.


	17. Chapter 16 update

CHAPTER 16

"Oh God what happened," Naruto said as he woke up.

"Hey guys he's up!" Someone shouted causing Naruto to wince in pain from his headache.

"Good now bring him down here so I can beat his ass!" a female voice shouted.

"OKAY! Sorry about this Naruto," the male voice said as he pulled Naruto up from the bed. "But I'm not going against her," the voice finished as they entered the dining room. Taking a seat Naruto saw Tazuna and his family in the kitchen obviously trying to hide from someone, Carolina looking as if she could kill him any second, and Washington sitting furthest away from both of them.

"So, Uzumaki can you explain to me why you didn't show up for dinner, why you went on a mission where the client couldn't pay the amount needed to, and why you fought a A-rank missing ninja," she said in a voice that promised pain if he didn't give a good answer.

"Because these people needed help," Naruto said and watch as her anger slightly lowered.

"That still doesn't explain why you went on your own and why you fought Zabuza." She said.

"I went on my own because the team left already and fighting Zabuza wasn't on my schedule," he said.

"You could've died trying to help people you don't know!" she yelled.

"You know some of my favorite quotes came from my ancestor and it says this, my story is but one of many thousands, and the world will not suffer if it ends too soon," Naruto said in a calm tone.

"But I would've suffered!" she screamed at him and was about to say more but a pair of lips smashed into hers. After a few minutes the lips left her mouth.

"And that's why I'm alive," Naruto said as he flicked away some tears that fell from her face. "Now come on I'll you something better than the dinner we missed," he says as he picks her up and takes her upstairs to his room.

AUTHORS

Hey guys sorry for the shortness of the chapter and how long it's been. I just wanted to post it because it's my only free time. My chapters may be shorter because of high school and such. And its also short because I'm changing the way I type for my ITT class which is like writing in a new language. Anyways for those who don't want a harem stay with me because you'll get the best of both worlds. I don't own red vs blue or Naruto this is purely fan based.


	18. Chapter 17 the rasengan

"Ugh, what happened last night?" Naruto said as he got up from bed but didn't when he felt a weight on his chest. Looking down he saw Carolina laying down on his chest wearing nothing. "Oh now I remember," he said to himself as he did a substitution with a pillow. He then put his clothes back on and walked down stairs. "Morning miss?" Naruto asked the women who was making breakfast.

"My name is Tsunami, I am Tazuna's daughter, would you like some breakfast?" she introduced/asked.

"Yes please," Naruto said as he took a plate and put some eggs, bacon, and toast on it. "Where is Tazuna?" Naruto asked while he was mouthing down his food.

"Father is at the bridge with your friend," she said.

"Okay then since he is being guarded I'm going to train," Naruto said as he finished his food.

"Why even bother," a new voice said and looking at the stairs Naruto saw a kid wearing one of the dumbest hats he has ever seen and some clothes (don't know what they're called). "You're just going to die," he said.

"Inari be respectful," Tsunami scolded.

"Shut it woman why should I be respectful to a fool," The now identified Inari said.

"You know kid you should be more respectful to your parents," Naruto said.

"Shut up you stupid ninja don't talk back to the ones that are paying you," Inari said.

"FYI I'm not being paid for this."

"Well then you're a whole lot dumber than I thought you were."

"And why is that?"

"Because no matter how hard you try you will die."  
"Then how will I die?"

"By Gato he's too strong for anybody to kill!" Inari screamed and then there was silence.

"HAHA!" Naruto laughed out loud.

"WHAT'S SO FUNNY?!"

"Kid I've faced ninjas and soldiers that are far tougher to kill than Gato."

"So what, Gato has an army of bandits and mercenaries."

"Whatever it's not like I haven't faced an army of bandits before," Naruto said uncaringly. "You know what kid I bet you all my money that wherever your father is he would be ashamed of you."

"HOW DARE YOU SAY THAT!" Inari screamed. "If you lived my life you wouldn't last a say so don't you dare say something like that."

"Oh and what happened to the big baby," Naruto said in a mocking tone.

"Fine this is how it happened (Insert the whole sob story bullshit)," Inari explained. "See I lived in the worst possible way while you lived protected in your village and lived a carefree life," Inari said and then immediately pissed himself when the temperature dropped drastically and great amounts of KI was released.

"Carefree life you say, while I admit you have the right to mourn you have no right to say that, my entire life I had to look over my shoulder so that I didn't get beaten and torture, I had to steal for food on a daily basis but I still starved, every single day for ten years this happened until I met those who I could trust and eventually they became my family so don't you ever say that I lived a carefree life because I didn't," Naruto said in a dark voice. "So you should be more appreciative of what you have because you don't know how long you'll have it."

"O-okay," Inari said as he ran back upstairs crying.

"Sorry about that I just hate being reminded of my past," Naruto apologized.

"No it's me who should apologize for Inari's actions," Tsunami said.

"No you don't have to apologize, anyways I'm going to train," Naruto said as he got up and walked out the door.

(AT THE FOREST)

"Okay Kurama what do you have for me?" Naruto asked his A.I

"You brought the water balloons and rubber balls right?" Kurama asked as he appeared on Naruto's shoulder and got a shake of the head for yes. "Good now take the water balloon and pop it with chakra."

"And how am I supposed to do that?" Naruto asked.

"By having your chakra swirl uncontrollably in the water," Kurama explained.

"Like this?" Naruto said as he placed his hand on the balloon and watched it pop.

"Y-yes," Kurama said in surprise not expecting him to finish the first step so fast. "Next step involves using the rubber ball and popping it with a denser chakra," Kurama explained and was again shocked when he saw the rubber ball burst into pieces. "I'm not sure what to say at this point."

"Is this supposed to be hard?" Naruto asked.

"Yes because the fourth took two years to master what you just did," Kurama said.

"I think this just proves how awesome I am," Naruto said.

"Careful kit I think that you're already big ego is getting bigger," Kurama said.

"Why can't you allow me to enjoy my accomplishments?" Naruto said sadly.

"Because I'm a dick that's why."

"Well I already knew that, anyways what is the next step?" Naruto asked.

"The final step is to combine the two into a sphere of chakra."

"Like this?" Naruto asked as he formed a blood red sphere in his palm.

"Well I'll be damned, congratulations kit you just made the rasengan one of your father's most feared jutsus," Kurama said. "Now work on creating it faster and use it against the trees and don't bother me I'm going to take a nap."

"Lazy fox," Naruto mumbled to himself and worked on the rasengan.

(A FEW HOURS LATER)

Naruto was standing in a field of destroyed trees with his shirt off and his pants torn up and his jacket ripped up. "Okay let's try this one more time," he mumbled to himself and opened up his palm and formed a huge red sphere that was the size of a tree. "GIANT RASENGAN!" he shouted as he slammed it into a tree and watched as it easily tore through that tree and hundreds more. "RASENGAN EXPLOSION!" and then a huge explosion that destroyed the forest in a bright white light formed and the white light shot up in the air. When the light faded it showed a huge crater and in the middle of it was a sleeping Naruto.

AUTHORS NOTE

Hey guys sorry about the last chapter or update, however you prefer, but I hope this makes up for it. Now I don't think I got any questions so if you have any just ask. Now for my question I got a review from a guest that said giggity and in my entire life I've only met one man who has said that and he is an Xbox live friend so my question to the guest who said that is this are you Big John 343? Just really need to ask. Anyways I don't own Naruto or red vs blue


	19. Chapter 18 wolf, child, sex, fight?

CHAPTER 18

(IN THE FOREST)

A figure with black hair, brown eyes, and wearing a pink kimono (I think that's what they're called) was walking through the forest, or in this case what remained of the forest. "Ugh what time is it?" A voice asked and looking around the figure saw the hero of this story laying down in a crater with only his shredded pants on.

 _How did I miss that_? The she asked to herself, _I mean come on that is huge crater_ , she keeps thinking to herself because of how lonely they are, _Fuck you author_ , The she said thinking that the authors feelings were actually hurt, _go narrate somebody else's life_ , she keeps thinking to herself like the lonely bitch she was, now continue on with the story.

"Sir, are you awake?" she asked Naruto as she kicks him with her foot.

"Yes I'm awake you damn bitch," Naruto said as he got up. "Hey aren't you the one that took Zabuza away before I could kill him?" Naruto asked as he reached to the kunai pouch that was behind him.

"Hey didn't your mother teach not to say those type of things to a lady?" she asked in annoyance as ice started to form around her.

"Wait you're a lady I thought you were a walking corpse," Naruto said.

"What do you mean by that?" She asked as the ice started to travel to him at a fast pace.

"I mean this!" Naruto shouted as he took out a silenced magnum and shot her between the eyes. Then in a poof of smoke, there was a small light blue wolf pup with a bullet right between its eye's.

"Hey Naruto what did I miss," Kurama said as he appeared on Naruto's shoulder and looked down at the wolf pup. "Sheesh kit I knew you were angry from last night but you didn't have to take out on a poor wolf pup."

"What's this, am I hearing right, is the great Kurama lord of all demons, lover of all strippers, and mass murder, actually caring about what happens to a non-demon wolf pup, I think I might cry," Naruto said in a sarcastic tone to which Kurama just flicked him off. "Anyways this is actually Zabuza's acquaintance."

"Hmm correct me if I'm wrong but I'm pretty sure the acquaintance was a human," Kurama said in a 'you're stupid' tone.

"Well mister super smart A.I I'm pretty sure that the bounty book says that Zabuza received the ice wolf summon when he received his sword, and I'm also pretty sure that summons can use chakra for something like a henge," Naruto explained.

"Okay let's go to a different subject," Kurama said.

"Wouldn't most people want to investigate the body?" Naruto asked.

"Kit do we seem like most people?" Kurama asked/said.

"You got a point there, now let's head back to the house," Naruto said as they walked back to the house.

(AT TAZUNA'S HOUSE)

Naruto was walking into the house when he heard two voices speaking to a young child. "So you're the brat that ratted out Tazuna am I right?" A man with an eye patch asked.

"Yep now where is my money?" Inari asked with his hand held out.

"Sorry kid the thing is that Gato doesn't do business with small children, so were going to have to kill you," the other male said as they were about to swing their swords. "Any last words kid?" they asked.

"Yea, say hi to my father when you burn to hell," Naruto said as he appeared behind them and chopped of their heads with his sword before looking at Inari. "And you kid I'm going to beat your ass later," Naruto said as he knocked Inari out. "HEY TSUNAMI WHERE ARE YOU!" Naruto shouted as he searched for Tsunami.

"In here," she shouted from the bathroom. Naruto then walked to the bathroom and opened it up and he was immediately hit with the smell of booze and sex. Looking inside he saw Tsunami in a ripped up bra and ripped up panties that were all black, he also saw a man in his mid-thirties passed out in the bathtub with no clothes on. "Do you need something?" she asked.

"Uh, you do know what was happening in the main room," he said.

"No what happened?" she asked as she put a shirt and new panties on.

"Just ask your son, anyways why are you in the bathroom with a passed out man and almost no clothes on?" he asked.

"I'm a prostitute," she answered.

"You know what I'm not going to ask any further, but do you know where my friends are?" Naruto said/asked.

"At the bridge, and before you go would you like some of this?" she asked as she pulled her panties down.

"U-uh no thanks, got to go," he said as he ran out the door and out the house.

(AT THE BRIDGE)

A heavy mist was surrounding the bridge. "Fear me for I am Zabuza demon of the mist," Zabuza said from the mist.

"Wait aren't you the guy who Naruto totally destroyed?" Wash asked as he ducked from the giant blade.

"It was a tie," Zabuza said with annoyance in his voice.

"Really Zabuza because last time I checked I would've beaten your sorry ass if it wasn't for that bitch summon," a new voice said as the mist was blown away by a gust of wind.

"You just got lucky," Zabuza said.

"Then how about we see who the better swordsman is," the voice said. "I, Naruto Uzumaki, challenge you to a sword duel and winner gets the others blade, just to let you know I'm going to kick your ass," Naruto said as he unsheathed his blade.

"You're on brat," Zabuza said as he got into his stance and charged forward. Naruto also charged forward and jumped up into the air and once he was over Zabuza he brought both his hands onto his blade and shot down to him in a crouch like position (Think of Link's downward air attack from the latest super smash brothers brawl). Naruto was about to hit Zabuza when Zabuza rolled to the right and avoided the blade. Pulling the blade out of the ground Naruto charged forward and did a right slash to the waist only for Zabuza to lift his blade to block and pushed Naruto backwards. Naruto landed on his feet but immediately raised his blade above him and it met with Zabuza's blade. Naruto then swept his feet under Zabuza's leg and Zabuza landed down on his back. Naruto kicked the blade out of Zabuza's hand while he fell and brought his sword upwards and brought it down aiming for Zabuza's chest. But Zabuza brought his feet up and caught it between the soles of his feet and twisted the sword out of Naruto's hand and sent it flying to where Zabuza's blade was. They both got up and looked at each other, then at the blades, then at each other, then back to the blade and they both ran towards their blade at break neck speed. Naruto picked up his blade and then did a back flip as Zabuza swung his blade at Naruto. As soon as Naruto landed on his feet he disappeared in a blur and reappeared behind Zabuza and managed to cut off his left arm. "Fuck that hurt kid," Zabuza said as blood shot out of his arm. Zabuza lifted up his sword shakily and charged at Naruto with a horizontal right to left slash. Naruto leaned back as the sword sailed over his head and left a mark on his nose, and the blade went so fast Naruto could see the after image. As soon as the blade was done swinging Naruto placed his hands on the ground and kicked off the ground with his hands staying in place, and kicked Zabuza in the face with his foot which sent Zabuza a few feet off the ground. Naruto pushed off the ground with his hands and turned his body so that he was upright when he landed on the ground. Zabuza landed on the ground with a thud and slowly got up, using his sword as a crutch. "Damn kid you are tough as fuck to fight, now let's finish this in one final attack like last time," Zabuza said as he gripped his blade and it started to glow a neon blue.

"I couldn't agree more," Naruto said as he sent wind chakra and regular chakra to his blade and it glowed neon red and the dragon mark looked like it was actually moving on the blade and it grew a few inches. They both charged forward and the blades met with each other in a burst of white energy that surrounded them. This time a red dragon and blue wolf appeared above the battle both made of energy. Zabuza's sword started to be pushed back but then a dark blue wolf appeared on the sword and looked like it was moving. Naruto then used his hand and swiped away Zabuza's sword and brought his own sword right through the heart of the demon. Zabuza looked down in shock and then looked back at Naruto.

"Good job kid you won so take the blade and continue the line of the demon," Zabuza said as he placed his sword in Naruto's hand and fell down on the ground dead.

"Said *huh* I could *huh* kick your ass," Naruto said as he passed out and a blue light came from Zabuza's sword and engulfed him and then disappeared along with Naruto.

(IN THE SUMMON REALM)

"What happened, wait did Griff actually manage to make me do drugs?" Naruto asked himself as he sat upright.

" **Hello harbinger of peace** ," an old deep voice said. Looking around Naruto saw that he was in a snowy mountain with wolves of all shapes and sizes on the rocky cliffs. The one that stood out the most was the giant wolf in front of him that was five times bigger than the hokage tower, fur color was ice blue, and he had a beard of sorts.

"Yep, definitely drugs," Naruto said as he passed out again.

AUTHORS NOTE

Hey guys sorry for the long update but between school and trying to start up my new story it's been hard. Anyways no questions so by all means leave some because I like to interact with you guys and gals. I do not own Naruto or Red vs Blue this is purely fan based.


	20. Chapter 19 the wolf

CHAPTER 19

"Ugh, where the hell am I?" Naruto asked himself as he looked around and saw that he was in cave that had little light and was completely empty. "Well no one ever learned anything by sitting around," he said to himself as he walked towards the caves exit and immediately regretted it because he was hit with a blast of cold air.

" **Ah so you awake young one** ," the voice from before said and looking to his right he saw the old wolf sitting straight and was looking out towards the sunset. Naruto walked towards the wolf and sat down next to him.

"No I'm totally not awake I'm just naturally sleep walking and in order to find the best source of warmth my body came out here while I'm dreaming about being in a island paradise," Naruto said sarcastically as he shivered and then felt a tail swat him in the back of the head. "Ow what the hell was that for!" Naruto yelled.

" **Learn to respect your elders you should** ," the wolf said.

"Anyways why the am I here?" Naruto asked.

" **Why are you here, that is one of life's great mysteries** ," the voice said.

"The fuck, no I'm asking why I'm on this cold ass mountain with a bunch of wolves that can speak," Naruto said.

" **Oh, that's what you meant, you are up here because you are the new ice wolf summone** r," the wolf said.

"Okay and why am I becoming your summoner?" Naruto asked.

" **Because you killed our previous summoner, and since he was an ass you don't have to go through the trial to become the summoner**."

"Wait what was the trial?" Naruto asked.

" **It was to bed over a hundred women**."

"Man if Tucker was here he'd probably take the trial for me whether I wanted him to or not.

" **Now each summoner gets their own familiar, for instance had the now dead Haku, so now you will pick between three wolf pups,** " the old wolf explained and then he howled and three wolf pups appeared right in front of Naruto. They all looked like Poochyena from the Pokémon games he used to play, one had light blue as the dominant fur color and snow white as its secondary color, the next one was dark blue for its primary color and black for its secondary, the final one was ice blue for its primary color and gray for its secondary color.

"Hmm this is a tough decision but I'll think I'll go with the second one," Naruto said as he picked up the dark blue one. "What's his name?" Naruto asked.

" **This one's name is Sirius,** " the old wolf answered. " **Now I will send you back to your world,** " the wolf said as blue energy started to surround Naruto and Sirius.

"Wait what's your name?" Naruto asked as he started to disappear.

" **The names Artic and by the way Sirius can't speak English** ," Artic said.

"Fuck you," Naruto said as he disappeared in a flash.

" **Ah this should be interesting** ," Artic said to himself.

 **(BACK AT THE BRIDGE)**

Naruto found that he was in the exact same spot he was before he went to the summon realm. Looking around everything was the same, Zabuza was still dead, Washington and Carolina were protecting Tazuna, and there was an army of bandits with a small man who looked like he tried to be Mickey Mouse when he was a kid but failed miserably and was now permanently ugly. Wait maybe the last part wasn't there when he left.

"Thanks kid for dealing with Zabuza now I don't have to pay him, not that I was going to," the Mickey Mouse imposter said. "Now kill them all!" he yelled and the bandits started charging forward.

"Ugh, you know what I've been dealing with prostitutes, children who are assholes, an A-rank ninja, talking to wolves, and freezing my ass off in a snowy mountain, and now this," Naruto complained. "Well now I'm going to finish this off in one blow," Naruto then picked up his dragon sword and picked up the wolf sword. But as soon as he touched it, it glowed blue and started changing shape. When the light died down a katana that was the same size as the dragon sword appeared. It was a light blue blade with a pack of grey wolves in a pack running up the blade on both sides.

"Ah hell yea time to kick some serious ass," Naruto said as he sent chakra to both swords and watched the dragon one glow like last time and the wolf sword glowed neon blue and the wolves on it looked like they came to life. He then charged forward and with one swing from each sword took down all the bandits. All the body parts of the bandits went up in the air and fell back down creating blood rain. Seeing this the Mickey Mouse imposter tried to jump of the bridge only to be caught by the end of his shirt.

"Okay who the hell are you?" Naruto asked in a threatening way and the blood was still raining and there was a light demonic glow around him. Add all this together and Naruto basically looked like a demon.

"M-my name is Gato, please don't kill me I'll give you anything," Gato said.

"Anything?" Naruto asked.

"Yes, anything," Gato said with more confidence that he would live.

"Bring back every person you killed," Naruto said and like that all of Gato's confidence went down the drain.

"B-but I can't do that," Gato said as he pissed himself.

"Well then that's too bad," Naruto said as the demonic glow grew and this made Gato shit himself to the point where there was a twenty foot circle of shit surrounding him. Naruto walked up to him and took at his silent magnum and shot Gato in the dick and then cut it off with a kunai. Ripping off some cloth from a dead bandit he picked up the dick, which was sulked in piss and somehow still pissing, shoved it down Gato's throat and made him suffocate on his own dick.

Naruto walked back to everybody and saw the entire town armed to the teeth with rakes and shovels and other farming tools. "GATO'S DEAD!" they all screamed as they danced around like mad man.

"WE SHALL HAVE A FEAST HONORING OUR NEW GOD'S!" Tazuna shouted and everybody somehow set up an entire carnival with food and rides and games and merchandise.

"What the fuck is this?" Naruto asked Kurama, Carolina, and Washington.

"Kit I have no idea," Kurama said.

"These people are weird," Carolina said

"WOOHOO A PARTY!" Wash yelled as he ran into the carnival only to be stopped by Carolina.

"Wash do me a favor and look over there," Carolina said as she pointed to the beginning of the bridge. Looking over there everyone saw a podium that had three poles under firewood.

"PEOPLE OF THE WAVE, WE HAVE BEEN LIBERATED THANKS TO OUR GODS AND LIKE ANY OTHER GODS WE'VE HAD WE SHALL BURN THEM AT THE STAKE!" Tazuna yelled from atop the podium

"Umm I say we run," Naruto said as he got into a sprinting pose.

"Agreed," everyone on the team said as they ran away from the crazy village and headed towards the leaf.

 **(AUTHORS)**

Hey guys sorry for the long update but before we go into comments and reviews I would like everybody to have a moment of seriousness. Yesterday was a day that effected many people's lives and was a tragic event that killed many in an act of terrorism. Hopefully you all know I'm talking about **nine eleven**. I would like you all to take a moment of silence to honor who ever died in the tragic event.

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Okay now that we have taken are moment of silence I will answer my only question that came from the predicting guest, I haven't decided but I may do some things and may do others. I do not own red vs blue or Naruto this is purely fan based.


	21. Chapter 20 normal day

CHAPTER 20

"And that's what happened old man," Naruto said as he explained to the Hokage about the unofficial mission. The Hokage leaned back in his chair and pinched his nose.

"Naruto, you probably did one of the most fucked up missions of all time," Sarutobi said. "You won't get paid for the mission since it was unofficial but you will get payed for killing Zabuza," he said as he took out a piece of paper from his desk and handed it to Naruto. "Go speak to the person in charge of handing out bounties. He will be in the room right next to mine," Sarutobi said as he pointed to the right.

"Okay, see you when I see you old monkey," Naruto said as he walked out the door.

"Brats these days have no respect for the elderly," Sarutobi said to himself.

 _*BANG*_ a loud crash was heard from behind him. Looking over his shoulder he saw a man in a red and white clothes and white spiky hair. "Long time old monkey," the white haired man said.

"What do you want Jiraiya?" Sarutobi said.

"What a student can't come by and see his old sensei," Jiraiya said.

"You only visit me when you want to peek or you have information, now which of the two are you here to see me for?" Sarutobi said/asked and Jiraiya's face turned serious.

"My spies tell me that Orochimaru is planning an attack on Konoha and it's going to be soon," Jiraiya said as he gave Sarutobi a scroll.

"This could be bad Jiraiya," Sarutobi said as he finished reading the scroll. "So I want you to remain in the village until the exams are over okay," Sarutobi said.

"Sure, now if you'll excuse me there is an entire village to peek on and only one man can peep at them all," Jiraiya said as he jumped out a different window.

"I should replace those windows," Sarutobi said and then started crying anime tears. "But then it would add onto the huge amount of paper work I've tried not to do in the past few years," he said as he looked to his right and saw piles of paper stacked up to the roof that filled half the room. He then cried more and more.

 **(SCENE CHANGE)**

Naruto walked into the room the old man told him to enter. What he saw was creepy to say in the least. He saw bloody hooks hanged by chains from the ceiling, the room was pitch black dark, bones littered the floor, the sounds of a man screaming were heard, a little light, and to the right was a man wearing brown jeans that were ripped up and he was bleeding and had a lot of scars on his chest and back and a bloody whip to his left on the ground.

"How the hell is something like this near the Hokage's office? Wait scratch that how the hell does no one hear that screaming?" Naruto asked himself as he walked towards the light.

"Why hello there little boy," a raspy voice said and looking behind him Naruto saw a small, pale, bald, hunched back man. "How can I help you?" he asked.

"I'm here for the bounty on Zabuza the demon of the mist," Naruto said as he handed the man the paper. The man snatched the paper out of Naruto's hand and read through it.

"Seems authentic, let me go get your money," the man said as he walked to a desk, took out a stool and got on top of the desk. The man then reaches down and opens a bin and got out some rolls of a hundred dollar bills (not familiar with the difference of values for American money to Yen so just go with it). "Here you go young man," the man said as he walked up to Naruto and gave him the money. Naruto took out a small scroll and sealed the money away.

"I'll be on my way," Naruto said as he walked out the room. "That was freaky," Naruto whispered to himself as he walked out the tower and to the bases.

 **(SCENE CHANGE)**

Naruto walked into the reds and blues in their armor with gravity hammers, besides Tucker who has his sword out, chasing Griff who has a ball in his hand. "What the hell are they doing?" Naruto asked himself.

"They're playing Griffball it's a game from where we come from," Carolina said as she walked out of the base.

"But why are they playing it?" Naruto asked.

"One the game involves hitting Griff and two you get to hit Griff," Carolina said.

"You said you get to hit Griff twice," Naruto said.

"I know," Carolina said.

"Is there any point to the game besides to hit Griff?" Naruto asked.

"Well if Griff can make it to that little spot right there the bomb he is holding will explode," Carolina said.

"Is this entire game used for the purpose of hurting Griff?" he asked her.

"Pretty much," she said and Naruto had to sweat drop at this.

 _*BOOM*_ they looked towards the sound of the explosion and saw Griff laying on the ground and his armor was now black from the ash and dirt and the others were repeatedly hitting Griff with their hammers. "Not the balls," Griff said as he curled up into a ball. "OWWW!" he screamed as a hammer smashed his balls and Naruto had to wince.

"You guys are savages," Naruto said.

"You are just realizing this now," Carolina said.

"I guess I should have realized this earlier," Naruto said.

"Yes you should have," Carolina said and Naruto mumbled something about annoying red heads. "What was that," She said.

"Nothing at all," Naruto quickly said.

"Can you two love birds stop talking, I have something to say," Kurama said as he appeared on Naruto's shoulder and sat on it.

"What is it Kurama?" Naruto asked his fox A.I.

"The Chunin exams are coming up and your team is signed up for it," Kurama said to them.

"When does it start?" Naruto asked.

"Tomorrow," Kurama said.

"But I just got home from an A-rank mission," Naruto complained.

"No you and your team got back from a vacation that the Hokage didn't know about," Kurama said.

"According to who," Naruto asked.

"The one who leads your team," Kurama said.

"You know I really hate you," Naruto said.

"Oh I love you to kit, now we shall train for the exams," Kurama said.

"Shouldn't we conserve our energy," Naruto said.

"Nonsense what's the point of having an exam if you're not ready for it," Kurama said.

"It's literally tomorrow," Naruto said.

"The more reason to prepare," Kurama said.

"We just got back from killing an A-rank ninja don't you think we are prepared for some ninja that have probably never killed before," Naruto said.

"I don't know, so much could've happened while you were on vacation. You could've gotten lazy, your muscles can't handle basic techniques, and your chakra could've been lowered," Kurama said.

"I was on a mission and you know it," Naruto said.

"You mean vacation," Kurama said.

"Ugh, you are the most stubborn person I know," Naruto said.

"You mean A.I," Kurama said.

"Stop correcting me when I'm right," Naruto said.

"Stop complaining and drop down and give me twenty," Kurama said as he played a whistle noise.

"You can't make me," Naruto said and then fell down to the ground when he felt a shock go through his entire body. "What was that?" Naruto asked.

"Since I have access to your body I just increased the amount of static electricity that your body absorbs and made your body shock itself," Kurama said.

"I am going to delete your digital ass when this is over," Naruto said.

"That's not the first time I've heard that, now back to training," Kurama said and all throughout the night Naruto trained and didn't fall asleep until five A.M.

 **AUTHORS NOTE**

 **Hey guys sorry for the short chapter and the long update. Since school has started I've had too much homework to do and the time that I do have I spent on updating my other stories. If you have any questions leave it in the review. Yes the others may get summons it really depends. Now for my question, you see whenever I try to upload an image in image manager it says that it might take 24 hours to upload, I wait 24 hours and the image isn't uploaded. If you have an answer for why this is happening then it would be greatly appreciated if you told me. I do not own Naruto or Red Vs Blue this is purely fan based.**


	22. Chapter 21 The Exams Part One

**CHAPTER 21**

 **UPDATE HAS BEEN A WHILE DUE TO SCHOOL AND WORK**

 **5:01 A.M**

"WAKE UP!" Kurama yelled as he right next to Naruto's ear.

"AH!" Naruto yelled in surprise as he sprung up from bed and looked at the alarm clock. "WHAT THE HELL KURAMA!" he yelled.

"Exams begin at 11:00 A.M so we need to prepare," Kurama said.

"I didn't get any sleep," Naruto said as he rubbed his eyes.

"Correction, you got one minute of sleep," Kurama said.

"I swear to God, I'm killing you when I wake up," Naruto said as he started to fall asleep again until an electric jolt went through his body.

"You slept long enough lazy ass, now eat and then start training," Kurama said as he took over a robotic body and through a box of stale macaroni and ketchup at him.

"How am I supposed to eat this?" Naruto asked.

"You eat the macaroni and drink the ketchup," Kurama said.

"I really hate you," Naruto said.

"Well good for you now hurry the fuck up," Kurama said.

"Who the hell is making all that noise!" a cranky female voice yelled as she entered the kitchen. Kurama left the body, which fell limp, and went back inside of Naruto's head.

"U-uh, Kurama," Naruto said as he pointed at the now uninhabited robot.

"Likely excuse," she said as she pounded her fist into her palm.

"*GULP* Come on Carolina, I'm sure we can work this out," Naruto said as he put his hands up and backed up slowly.

"You woke me up from a good dream, it needs retribution," Carolina said as she walked up to Naruto and proceeded to pound him into a bloody pulp. Once finished she walked back to her room leaving a bloody and bruised Naruto on the ground.

"Ow," Naruto whimpered.

"Back to training," Kurama said as he appeared on his shoulder.

"Fuck you," Naruto said as he sent horrid images of green spandex men to Kurama.

"Okay go to sleep you pathetic human, just let me keep my sanity," Kurama said as he went back into Naruto's head.

"Thank God," Naruto said as he fell asleep on the floor.

 **(TIME SKIP)**

"Wake up Naruto," Washington said as he pounded a spoon against a pan right next to Naruto's head.

"I'm up," Naruto said as he got up.

"The exams are in five minutes, come on," Washington said as he handed Naruto a pair of clothes and pushed him into the bathroom and closed the door behind him.

Naruto put on a long sleeve white shirt on, a pair of blue jeans, and black skating sneakers. He then walked out the bathroom and was immediately yanked into the kitchen where someone grabbed onto his shoulder and they disappeared in a shunshin leaving tons of leaves on the ground.

"Hey guys I'm home," Doc said as he entered the kitchen. "What the heck happened here?" he asked as he saw a robotic body on the ground, stale macaroni everywhere, ketchup everywhere, and leaves everywhere. "Why can't this place stay clean for one day?" he asked himself as he walked to a closet and pulled out a broom and started cleaning the mess.

 **(SCENE CHANGE)**

"What the hell, who the hell, and how the hell?" Naruto asked as he looked around the room he was in.

"You're welcome," Washington said as he leaned on Carolina for support. "I learned the Shunshin yesterday and I just now realized how much I hate it," he said as he barfed on the ground.

"Too tired to care right now, let's just go," Naruto said and they walked into room 301.

Looking around he saw the hateful glares of ninja as they blasted his team with killing intent.

"Wow, Donut is more threatening than this and that's saying something," Naruto said as he blasted back killing intent triple of what they made. The inexperienced ninja fell on their knees and the other ones leaned on chairs for support.

"THE ALPHA IS HERE!" an annoying arrogant voice said and looking behind them they saw team 8 with two members leaning on the table and the mutt trainer standing boldly.

How is he not affected by the killing intent, it normally affects someone who has and IQ over 0, Naruto thought as studied Kiba, Wait this is Kiba we're talking about, I doubt he knows what an IQ is.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP MUTT, THE ALMIGHTY UCHIHA IS COMING!" a loud voice yelled and through the door way came sasugay, I mean Sasuke, with his little whore, I mean Sakura.

"SASUKE PLEASE HAVE MY BABIES!" Ino yelled as she ran through the door and practically started to unclothe Sasuke until Sakura tackled her.

"*YAWN* Hey Naruto," Shikamaru said as he walked up to team Freelancer.

"Hi Shikamaru," Naruto said as he took his attention of the two sluts, I mean mature women. "I thought you wouldn't be here," Naruto said as he blocked out the yelling of the two bitches, I mean sluts, wait I mean girls.

"I wasn't going to show up but my mother threatened to not make dinner for me for a week," Shikamaru said.

"That actually doesn't sound like –" Naruto began but stopped when Shikamaru spoke.

"And it's too much of a drag to make myself food," he said.

"Wow, you are really lazy," Naruto said.

"It's too much of a drag to not be lazy," he said as he laid down on a table and fell asleep.

"Would you guys quite down you're attracting a lot of attention," a silver haired man with glasses said as he walked up to the group.

"And who the hell are you," Tucker said as his team walked through the door.

"I'm Kabuto, I'm an information gatherer and a medic," Kabuto introduced himself.

"You sure as hell don't look like a Pokémon," Griff said as his team entered the room.

"I do not understand," Kabuto said.

"Never mind, you people wouldn't understand it anyway," Griff said as he waved his hand dismissively.

"Okay, would you like to see my cards?" Kabuto asked as he pulled out a deck of cards.

"All too familiar," Griff said.

"What do they do?" Sasuke asked as he walked up to Kabuto.

"They have information on every single person in the room," Kabuto

"Show me Gaara of the sand, Rock Lee, and Naruto Uzumaki," Sasuke said and Kabuto took out three cards.

"Gaara of the sand. Says here he has taken 34 D-rank missions, 31 C-rank missions, 26 B-rank missions, and 13 A-rank missions, says here he has no known skills but he has control for sand and has never been scratched before," Kabuto said as he showed them his card.

"Rock Lee. 24 D-rank missions and 13 C-rank missions, no known use of ninjutsu or genjutsu but is highly proficient at taijutsu," Kabuto said as he showed them his card.

"And Naruto Uzumaki. 50 D-rank missions, 34 C-rank missions, 5 B-rank missions, and one unofficial A-rank mission. Is highly proficient at ninjutsu and kenjutsu, wields two straight edge katanas, has fought and killed Zabuza demon of the mist, and has the ice wolf summoning contract, Kabuto said as he showed them a picture of when Naruto started as a genin and anybody who didn't know this looked at him in wonderment.

"Well I bet my card is better," Sasuke said.

"Sasuke Uchiha. 11 D-rank missions, 1 completed C-rank mission and 14 C-rank missions that were dropped due to not being Uchiha enough, and no other missions. Only knows the basic academy jutsu, has not unlocked his bloodline that most Uchiha awaken at the age of eleven (He's 12), knows only one fire jutsu that is weak as fuck, and has no other skills what so ever. The real question is why he has women ready to have sex with him when the most recent medical records say that his dick, if you can call it that, is only 0.5 centimeters and has not grown balls," Kabuto said as he showed them Sasuke's card and everyone, besides Sakura and Ino, laughed.

"I'll show a weak fire jutsu," Sasuke said as he flipped through a bunch of hand signs. "FIRE STYLE: GRAND FIREBALL JUTSU!" Sasuke yelled as he gulped in air and breathed out fire. But the fire was smaller than his dick, if physically possible.

"WAY TO GO SASUKE, YOU SHOWED THEM!" Sakura and Ino yelled and everyone else sweat dropped.

"Shut the fuck up maggots and sit the hell down," a gruff voice said from the smoke that appeared in the middle of the room. "I said SIT DOWN!" He yelled while unleashing his killing intent on them making everyone sit down. "I am Ibiki and this is the first part of the Chunin exams. The test will consist of nine questions and the tenth question will be asked at the last five minutes of the test. If you cheat you lose two points of the test and if you get kicked out the entire team gets kicked out," Ibiki said as he passed out papers to everyone but stopped when he saw the sleeping Shikamaru.

"Get this man to the forest of death, his plan was flawless and full proof." Ibiki said as two ninja walked up, picked up Shikamaru, and jumped out the window.

"What was his plan, Sir," a genin asked.

"If you can't see his plan then you don't deserve to be a Chunin," Ibiki said as he picked up the Genin and through him out the window. "BEGIN!" he shouted and everyone started the test.

"Kurama, do me a favor and do this test for me," Naruto said in his mind.

"Cheating on a test, this is a new low," Kurama said as he took control of Naruto's hands and started writing on the paper.

"That's the point and you know it," Naruto said.

"I never said a thing," Kurama said as he placed the pencil down and freed Naruto's hands from his control.

"Now to sleep," Naruto said as he fell asleep.

 **(TIME SKIP ONE HOUR LATER)**

"Time for the last question!" Ibiki yelled and Naruto woke up.

"But first you have two options. You can take the final question but if you fail you can never retake this test or you can quit, automatically forfeiting your teammates, and retake the test next year," Ibiki said and like that half of the room left. "Anyone else?!" He asked and no one left.

"Congratulations you passed the first part of the exam," Ibiki said.

"What!" a sand kunoichi from the back yelled.

"Leaving was the final question, you see in the –" Ibiki began but stopped when a figure crashed through the window and landed in front of him with a banner saying "The sexy and single Anko" (I think).

"Early as always Anko," Ibiki said to the women.

"Better early than never," she said.

"I believe the saying is better late than never," he said.

"Who cares," she said and then started to look around the room. "You have a shit ton of kids this year Ibiki, are you sure you're not losing your touch?" Anko said as she continued looking around the room but stopped on Naruto. "Mmm, I could fuck him all day," she said out loud.

"Uh, you do realize you said that out loud, right?" Ibiki asked.

"Don't give a fuck, meet me outside of the forest of death," Anko said as she jumped in front of Naruto, grabbed him by the arm, and disappeared in a shunshin leaving behind a pissed of Carolina.

"Wash, shunshin us right now!" Carolina demanded to the sick looking Washington.

"I don't want to," he said and was smacked across the face. "Okay I'll do it," he said and they disappeared in a shunshin.

 **(SCENE CHANGE)**

"You know lady, my girlfriend is going to be pissed when she sees this," Naruto said as he was tied on a wooden pole with no pants or underwear on.

"Damn you're huge," she said as she looked at his 11 inch cock and was about to touch it.

"Hands of bitch," Carolina said as she appeared a few meters behind them. Out of a storage scroll, popped out a magnum that she fired at Anko.

Luckily, or not, Anko moved out of the way before Carolina pulled the trigger. The bullet sailed and landed right under Naruto's ball, burning a little hair.

"WATCH IT!" Naruto yelled as he ripped himself out of the rope and pulled his pants back on.

The rest of the genin teams walked to the front of the gate and saw a strange sight. Two hot girls punching and kicking each other, a black haired guy moaning on the ground looking really sick, and a blond hair man holding his crotch.

"Now as much I would like to fight for dominance over your little boyfriend over there, I have better things to do," Anko said as she disappeared and reappeared on top of a booth.

"Listen up brats, this here is the forest of death. The goal in this trial is to find two scrolls. You will be given one scroll and you must find the other. The only way to find the other scroll is by fighting other teams for their scroll. Now if you would be so kind as to sign the wavers saying that if you die Konoha is not responsible," Anko explained and some genin teams left while the others went into the tents.

The remaining teams stand in front of the gates waiting to go. "BEGIN!" a voice yelled out through the area and they all ran into the forest, running to beat the exams.

 **AUTHORS NOTE**

 **Hey guys sorry for the long update. I've been busy with school and work so I don't have any time to write that much anymore. I will try updating a few stories a week because my grades have gone up to A's and B's. Any questions or comments are welcome unless they are hateful.**


	23. adoption

IT'S ALL UP FOR ADOPTION. IF YOU'RE INTERESTED IN ADOPTING THE STORY PLEASE PM ME!


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